Asleep
by Hang Him Higher
Summary: Gojyo is mesmerized by Sanzo. Yaoi, other warnings inside. Completed. Note: This was rewritten into a one-shot. The old, unfinished version is intact at the end.
1. Asleep Oneshot

**Warnings**: yaoi, dubcon, violent themes, crude language (Gojyo's POV-ishness)

**Author's Note**: This is a rewrite of "Asleep" into a one-shot rather than a series. The old version is still up in case you like that better, or maybe if you feel like comparing. The reason I did this is because I have no business writing a series. My inspiration comes and goes and I'm usually busy. I originally wrote this for my own fun and uploaded it on a whim to see if others would like it, and when I got a good response I kept it going. I hope you are happy with this one-shot, which ends sort of ambiguously. If anyone wants to be inspired by this story and continue it, I wouldn't mind (just send me a link!). For now, there is no plan on writing more with this plot.

* * *

Sanzo's chest was slowly rising and lowering in the rhythm of sleep, his face peaceful and relaxed. The stifling heat of the room had prompted him to kick off the bedsheets. Oddly enough, however, his robes were still on. During the night they had become tangled loosely around his body. A silk shirt and tight jeans were visible amidst the white cloth.

This scene was the image layed out before Gojyo where he stood, staring, in the middle of the room. He couldn't help it; Sanzo looked so serene when he slept. Plus, the way his pale skin glowed in the scattered moonlight was…pretty. It was like a painting he'd seen once. Though that had been of a beautiful and very nude woman, it had the same effect on him— mesmerizing. And the way his hair was shining made it seem more white than blonde. It reminded him of the time they'd stood listening to Sanzo's chant for the dead. The sunlight of dawn had shone over the scene, making him appear more than human, as the night he'd met him ended.

Gojyo took a few long strides closer until he was against the bed, careful not to jostle it. He didn't want to wake him, to be caught standing over him and staring. He was already embarrassed, embarrassed about staring but also about the effect Sanzo had on him. But there was no one around to see.

All of the sudden, a thought entered his head and wouldn't get unthought. This was no painting. He could get closer to it, something he'd already done. He could touch it. Without realizing what he was about to do, he reached out a steady hand and touched the white column of bared throat. With the monk's head twisted to the side, it was in sharp contrast to the black turtleneck. The contrast was to blame for making him want to touch, dammit.

His hand flinched back when he felt it stirring under his fingers, before he realized it was a pulse. Gojyo's heart was racing now, and he wasn't sure why. He swallowed and put his fingers back. There it was again; a pulse. _So baldy's got a heart after all_. The thought made him smirk.

Gojyo wasn't sure what he'd been expecting, nothing really; but, the effect this was having on him was unexpected. He could feel his face heating up and his body felt electric. He only ever felt this way when he knew he'd successfully gotten into a girl's pants, right before she invited him to her room. It was...an addictive thrill. It could explain what he was currently doing, maybe.

His fingers trailed down and over the black turtleneck. It was smooth and silky. He wasn't sure he'd ever touched it before. Which was strange. He supposed Hakkai had, plenty of times, while doing their laundry. He'd often commented on how tedious cleaning Sanzo's clothing was. It required careful handling, supposedly. Now Gojyo knew why. He'd never felt anything so pleasant to touch. _Damn, he wears this all the time? Lucky bastard!_

He'd often noticed how tight the shirt was when he could see it. Even in this light he could make out every contour of Sanzo's chest. He frowned as he lightly smoothed his hands over those concealed planes of muscles. Since when had Sanzo become so buff? He'd been so scrawny the first time Gojyo had seen him without a shirt. He'd thought nothing of it then. The only thing he'd been concerned about at the time, more than a year ago, was avoiding getting shot at by staring too long. I mean, who knew what the psycho would do; he could have been a big prude. Turns out he liked his privacy, but he didn't seem to care much about being naked around others. In fact, he'd often insist on it if there was room, to save time. (Boy, how he'd cracked homo jokes at that! Back when he didn't care.)

These days, however, Gojyo couldn't remember the last time he'd bathed at the same time as Sanzo. Actually, now that he was thinking about it, Sanzo had been avoiding him for awhile. Being avoided by Sanzo was nothing new, but the day-to-day physical distance, even during smoking breaks, was suspicious. The only reason they were sharing a room now was because Goku had an upset stomach and Hakkai was taking care of him.

Someone who was a bit more vigilant than Gojyo would have noticed something was definitely wrong awhile ago. But he'd just realized it; damned if he knew when it'd started. And he hadn't had a chance to see this defenseless version of Sanzo in months. Maybe that was why this was affecting him so much. It'd been awhile, and it was like he was seeing Sanzo for the first time. But this time there was no gun or a wanted convict to distract.

He felt like he was in a dream as he untied the sash holding the monk's robes together. His fingers went to the edges and pulled them back, fully revealing the tight black shirt and jeans. They really didn't leave much to the imagination. Gojyo's heart was pounding out of his chest now, and he breathed through his mouth to try to keep pace.

"Damn," he whispered.

Sanzo was so...vulnerable. How many times had he watched Sanzo's sleeping face during this journey? ...When had it become hard to do?

He had better access to Sanzo's chest, so he continued running his hands lightly over it. The silk was amazing. He ran his hands up, toward the neck. As he did so, Sanzo's breath hitched. Gojyo froze, suddenly stricken with fear. Was he awake?

But no, his breath resumed a slow, deep pace. Puzzled, Gojyo looked where his hands were and tried to figure out why he'd reacted like that. He flicked his thumbs, and it happened again. _Holy shit_, Gojyo thought, incredulous. _Sanzo's nipples!_

He found the soft nubs through the fabric with his thumb and forefinger and tweaked them. Another hitch in sleepy breath, plus Sanzo's face looked a little pink. Or maybe that was his imagination, since it was hard to see in this light. But, the thought that he could feel pleasure so easily...

A craving for more came over Gojyo. A little voice in his head interrupted, arguing, _But he's a DUDE!_

Gojyo was ready to pull his own hair out. This was fucked up. When had he started to feel this way about Sanzo?

Instead of freaking out, he rolled his fingers. Sanzo's lips parted as he make a light half-moan. An electric tingle shot up Gojyo the molester's spine. His pants suddenly felt too tight.

"Shit. Damn. Fuck," he hissed quietly, reaching down to adjust himself. His left hand was still attached to a nipple, though, and as he touched himself, he was playing with it. He'd only meant to move his hard-on so it wasn't pinching, but once he touched it he couldn't stop. He smoothed his thumb over at the same time he stroked himself through his jeans, and oh man, that was good. "You're feeling it, you damn monk," Gojyo whispered to him, glad Sanzo couldn't hear. The nub in his fingers was hard now and Gojyo really enjoyed how it felt with the silk over it.

Panting, Gojyo squeezed his cock. Seeing Sanzo's robe open and touching the shirt he'd only looked at from afar was getting himself fully hard, and compared to what he was used to that was nothing. It was crazy. He ran his hand over the silk again, lower and lower, and as he did so he stroked the bulge in his jeans.

Gojyo gritted his teeth at his body's reaction. An inner voice was yelling at him vehemently that he should stop, but he found he didn't want to. Sanzo was a light sleeper, but he wasn't waking up, so Gojyo felt emboldened. It really was like a dream, doing this. His raging boner was begging for more, but taking out his dick would be going way too far.

Maybe if he could see and feel more, his curiosity and arousal would be satisfied. Then he could go sleep, and everything would be fine tomorrow.

His fingers reached the edge where the black shirt and jeans met. Without hesitation he slid those fingers stealthily under the bottom hem. The fine hairs on Sanzo's stomach was unexpected—and he was so goddamn hard now he thought he'd burst. Yet he wasn't even close to coming, and he knew he couldn't stop there.

Carefully, watching for any signs of rousing, Gojyo pushed the tight shirt up. The damn thing was so tight he had to use both hands. But it wasn't long before he was too afraid to push it up any further, so his hand went back to his trapped erection. He stared hungrily at what he'd revealed, a small belly button and an almost invisible happy trail. Even though he was asleep and therefore relaxed, his abs were obvious.

Sanzo was still deeply asleep, but looked lewd now: skin bared with robes and blankets scattered around him. Gojyo watched his toned abdomen rise and fall, never imagining before that something like that could be erotic. It wasn't soft like a woman's, and his hips were too narrow. Yet...

_Now what?_ He was hesitating and he knew it. In reality he wanted to taste Sanzo so bad, wanted to feel his flesh with his tongue. It was so much more sensual and intimate that way. While he hovered, uncertain, a brief sliver of doubt wormed its way into his psyche. _What the hell am I doing?_

Then Sanzo shifted, fingers grabbing absently at his bunched up shirt and tugging weakly. Then he let go and relaxed so that his hand was resting on his bare stomach. He groaned in his sleep lightly, turned his face away from the window, and then resumed sleeping peacefully.

Gojyo let go of the breath he didn't know he was holding. Slowly and carefully he leaned down over Sanzo's chest and stuck out his tongue. Between Sanzo's fingers and dipping into his bellybutton, he finally got a taste. It wasn't about the taste, actually, since it just tasted like skin; it was the warmth. It was how very wrong this was, and yet Sanzo's stomach muscles jumped as he explored around his bellybutton. As if he was ticklish.

Sanzo sighed in what was probably pleasure. _What dreams are you having now, baldy? _Panting, he licked over the side of one of Sanzo's fingers, which tasted like acrid gunpowder.

Licking his lips, he rose up, being careful not to bump the bed. He stared at Sanzo's face, a face without a trace of worry lines or anger. Just peaceful, and perhaps a little red, unless Gojyo was hallucinating still. Gojyo smiled and ran his fingertips over Sanzo's stomach, around the hand still resting there.

He wondered if Sanzo was aroused in his sleep, so he trailed his fingers down to Sanzo's crotch area. He felt him gently through his jeans and was surprised to find a somewhat sizeable package there; nothing to compare to his own, but pretty good for most guys. Gojyo carefully, oh so carefully, undid the button and pulled the zipper down. Sanzo's manhood was right there, no boxers or even briefs in the way. Gojyo found himself staring at it. He didn't want to touch it, really; found the idea a little gross. But... he did want to see what Sanzo would do. And what he'd done so far hadn't been enough; what was enough, he had no idea.

Before he thought better of it he reached into the fly of Sanzo's jeans until he was touching it. He gave up massaging his poor aching cock and rested his hand on Sanzo's stomach, instead. It was hard to see, and he wanted to feel. As he wrapped his hand around Sanzo's dick, he felt the stomach under his right hand tense as his breath stuttered. Sanzo was limp, but it was stirring under his hand now. He watched Sanzo's face as he stroked his fingertips over the soft flesh, felt it twitch. Sanzo's brow furrowed, wrinkling his face a little. Unlike when he did that awake and angry, it was actually a little cute right now.

His dick was getting hard very quickly, though it was still mostly trapped in his jeans. The hanyou's fingers met precum and he rolled his forefinger over the source of the drops. This got a strong reaction Gojyo wasn't anticipating. Sanzo made a little "ah" sound, back arching and arms tensing. His cock twitched and got harder.

Then Sanzo woke up.

Gojyo quickly backed up as he saw his eyes opening, but Sanzo was too fast. He grabbed Gojyo's wrist, eyes opening fully and blinking, focusing on the dim room. He stared at Gojyo, who he held in a death grip, as he looked puzzled for a moment. Not very reassured by the face Gojyo was making, he pushed himself up with his free hand and looked down. His expression changed quick as lightning and he glared up at Gojyo with a very scary, unfathomable look. The darkness in the room only made the look even more horrific.

"Uh," Gojyo squeaked, panicking now. "...I can explain?"

Without letting him go, Sanzo reached under his pillow and pulled out his gun, training it on Gojyo. Gojyo stared at Sanzo with wide eyes, thinking, _Oh shit, now I'm dead_. The arm that Sanzo wasn't holding in a death grip came up in surrender as he looked from Sanzo's face to the gun and back. Fuck, he should have remembered that Sanzo kept his gun under his pillow. _I shouldn't've even done this shit in the first place._ He was frozen in shock, too scared to fight or try to get away.

Sanzo straightened his back, still achingly silent, just staring at Gojyo, who audibly gulped. Slowly, his fingers uncoiled from Gojyo's wrist. He used that hand to throw his loose robes over his open fly. Once finished, he opened his mouth like he was going to say something. Then he shut it again. Gojyo had looked away, unable to meet his gaze anymore during this awkward period. When he heard the snick of Sanzo cocking his gun, however, his eyes shot back to the shadowed face.

"Whoa, hey! Hold on!" Gojyo exclaimed, taking a half-step back. He froze as Sanzo spoke again.

"Shut up!" That growled command made him snap his jaw shut so fast he bit his tongue. His eyes watered from the pain, but he stayed quiet and still.

Sanzo's next growled words made his body jerk, startled. "Get over here."

Puzzled, Gojyo moved up against the side of the bed until his legs touched.

"Closer!"

Now completely freaking out in his head but too scared to disobey, Gojyo bent down, face reddening at his proximity to Sanzo. He could feel the heat radiating off the monk, feel his ragged breaths on his face. Remembering how he'd been feeling that heat while the man slept, Gojyo blushed heavier.

Sanzo lay back onto the bed, wiggled a moment as if he was getting comfortable, then pressed the gun to Gojyo's temple. Gojyo flinched, his wide, shocked eyes never leaving Sanzo's eyes, which he could now see more clearly looking back at him. He watched uncertainly out of the corner of his eye as Sanzo's free hand flung his robes back so his abs and groin were once more in view. He then pushed his jeans down until his erection was completely free.

"Wha—?" Gojyo started, eyes flicking to the hard-on Sanzo sported. The hard rod of flesh jutting from Sanzo's body was an incredibly debauched sight even now. He didn't notice his tongue darting out to wet his lips, but Sanzo did.

Thrusting the gun against Gojyo's head roughly, he growled, "Get down there."

Gojyo, gulping, leaned down until his face was right next to Sanzo's erection. There he froze, thoughts racing fast and heart beating faster. The metal pressed to his temple was softened by his hair, but he could still feel the cold steel, the very deadly threat, pressing into his head. He realized he was scared shitless, not just because of the gun but because he'd been caught, and now Sanzo was right in front of his face and—"Um," he said stupidly.

"Shut up and suck me off."

"B—but...!" He was dumbfounded.

Sanzo ground the gun into his head where he was currently resting it, behind Gojyo's ear. Gojyo's breath quickened. No way, this couldn't be happening.

"Do it!" Sanzo growled. His voice brooked no argument. Gojyo was convinced he'd really shoot him this time—he'd really fucked up—and it was better to do as he was told. Not that he hadn't done something like this before, but he'd been young—too young, really, but it was best not to think about that—and also really drunk. He didn't remember much but it wasn't something he'd wanted to do since, and certainly never imagined doing to Sanzo.

He grabbed the base of Sanzo's cock and guided it to his mouth. His hand and lips trembled as he put his lips against the head. Sanzo sighed in pleasure, and Gojyo felt another ridiculous electric tingle spread throughout his body. He opened his mouth and slid the velvety flesh inside. Then he sucked. Sanzo's hips bucked and his gun hand shook; he could hear metal rattling right next to his ear.

Sanzo's breath quickened, sucking in a breath as Gojyo took in more. When Gojyo made to retreat after only taking in the head, Sanzo pressed him down with his free hand. "Take it all in," he said in an equally shaky voice. He shoved hard, pressing Gojyo down until his cock was almost all the way engulfed. Gojyo gagged, but the press of Sanzo's hand and gun was insistent. He was coughing from the size and unfamiliar sensation, but tried suppressing the reaction. He really didn't want to die. So, he sucked.

"Oh fuck," Sanzo hissed, hips thrusting up into Gojyo's hot, wet mouth. The pressure on his head weakened so Gojyo pulled back, getting enough of the cock out of his mouth to breathe and cough. Once he recovered, he went back down without prodding. The next "prod" could be a bullet in his head, after all.

He began sucking in a slow up and down rhythm. The gun stayed trained on him, but Sanzo's hand let go. He couldn't see anything from his position, so he listened intently for any sign of his impending death, or some indication of pleasure if he was so lucky. Sanzo was panting loudly, partially drowned out by the sound of Gojyo's mouth sucking. The slick sound filled Gojyo's ears and he felt his face burning and his groin throbbing resolutely against his pants. As the minutes dragged by, his jaw began to ache and he was too afraid to move in any other way than he currently was. And his balls were going to explode if he didn't get some goddamn relief. This, he concluded, was torture. How women made this look so easy, he had no clue.

Besides that, Sanzo's cock was starting to taste kind of bitter and salty. Which wasn't that good. But, to his amazement he was finding more and more that despite everything he was enjoying this. Sanzo was gasping like he'd been running, and his hips jabbed forward sometimes, an uncontrollable signal of pleasure, Gojyo guessed. He never did that himself but whatever. He was feeling confident enough now to swirl his tongue around the head. His reward was a surprised and loud moan that suddenly filled the room. A damn sexy moan, for a guy.

Sanzo couldn't still be angry now, right? He slid the cock out of his mouth with a slick pop. Sanzo shifted the gun against his head, but Gojyo wasn't all that concerned anymore: he had no intention of stopping. His jaw was hurting too badly, so he wanted to try something else. Girls had done plenty of different things to him, one of which was to run their lips over his dick. So Gojyo tried it, finding that his tired jaw muscles could relax like this. Now he knew why girls liked to change it up, besides the fact that it felt good. Sanzo gasped at the contact.

Before he could do much else, Sanzo grabbed his hair and pulled him sideways and up. With his fist still in Gojyo's hair, he pushed the hunched over kappa down to his knees. Gritting his teeth, Gojyo obeyed the unspoken command, knowing the gun may not be touching him anymore but it was still aimed at him.

During the brief moment opened up by Sanzo kicking off the blankets tangling up his legs—something that would be funny normally—honestly, Gojyo flexed his aching jaw. He may have also prayed that he'd get out of this alive.

Finally Sanzo was free of the bed and walked the few steps to the only chair in the room, a rickety, thinly padded thing at an equally rickety table. He'd been sitting there earlier, cleaning his gun and then reading a newspaper.

When he got to it he turned around and released Gojyo's hair, his eyes like hard pits of black in the dark room. Then he shrugged his robes off his shoulders. The movement was easy and graceful. The gun was downturned for a moment, but Gojyo wasn't paying attention. He was too busy using the continued break to swallow the taste in his mouth and try not to piss off Sanzo by breathing, or existing. It was hard for his six-foot frame to appear small and insignificant, though, and he knew Sanzo wasn't buying it.

Sanzo sat down and continued to watch Gojyo, kneeling exactly where he left him and staring at the wood floor. Gojyo wondered what the deal was, but he didn't even bother to conceal the pained expression on his face from his aching jaw and aching hard-on. His cock was especially hurting, but he was too afraid to touch it with Sanzo staring.

Sanzo beckoned Gojyo impatiently with his gun and Gojyo swallowed hard before moving closer. Once he was close enough, the gun was put to his left temple. The now familiar sensation made him cringe slightly. Sanzo's other hand guided his head toward his erection. Gojyo sucked it in, and Sanzo pushed him down again, the bastard. He heard himself whine as his muscles flexed in an attempt to prevent another gagging session. The flesh in his mouth twitched at the sound.

This got the gears in his head cranking, so to speak. Being attentive as a lover was important to Gojyo; he considered himself an artist at fucking women. He'd spent many nights with different women, sometimes more than one at once, and he'd learned what they liked. He was not only really good at giving pleasure, but he enjoyed it—priding himself on it, really. So, when he noticed this reaction from Sanzo, he made a mental note. When Sanzo shoved his head down again, he repeated the sound of his own free will. When he got the same reaction he realized Sanzo was getting off on it. _Fucking sadist_, he thought. The worse off he sounded, the more it seemed to turn Sanzo on. That could only be a good thing, so he continued to do it. The sooner this ended, the better; his jaw hurt, his cock and balls hurt, and the gun trained on his head was leaving a permanent ring in his scalp.

Sanzo suddenly tensed considerably; Gojyo looked forward and saw his abs, still peeking out from beneath his shirt, visibly tighten. And then he remembered that Sanzo was holding a cocked gun to his head, which, during his impending orgasm, might be triggered by accident. He cried out, muffled by the hard flesh in his mouth, in a panic. He tried to retreat to get access to his throat so he could speak, but Sanzo gripped his hair harder and kept him still as he thrust into Gojyo's now futilely resisting mouth.

Gojyo whimpered in panic, squeezing his eyes shut. Sanzo, voice heavy with heightened pleasure, groaned as he came. Gojyo braced himself, squeezing his eyes shut, fully expecting a bullet any second. More distracting than that proved to be the liquid squirting into his mouth. He hadn't even been thinking about that part of it, and it hit the back of his throat. He started coughing and choking. He tried desperately to repress it, trying to keep still so Sanzo wouldn't move and trigger the gun. That didn't work out very well.

The hanyou didn't even notice Sanzo breathing heavily, just the fact that even though he was done, Sanzo hadn't let him go. He felt like he was going to choke to death, but he was too afraid to move, so his body began to shake. He was gripping Sanzo's thighs, digging in his nails, and making unrestrained choking sounds.

Sanzo sighed, then said in a more mellow voice than Gojyo expected, "Swallow."

That command barely registered. He didn't have a choice, did he? Before he thought too much about it, he swallowed what he could.

Sanzo's grip relaxed out of Gojyo's hair and Gojyo hurriedly pulled back, eliciting a soft gasp from the monk as his softening cock was pulled roughly out. Gojyo began coughing and hacking, unable to control himself by this point. When his airway was finally clear enough he began gasping like a fish out of water.

Sitting back on his heels he looked up at Sanzo. He suddenly realized that the gun was no longer resting against his temple; his eyes immediately sought out the gun before even registering the expression on Sanzo's face. He was resting his arm on the chair, but with the gun still aimed at Gojyo's torso. Gulping for air, the hanyou then looked back at his expression.

What he saw sent another wave of blood straight to his flagging cock. Sanzo's face was relaxed and his eyes were just staring half-lidded at Gojyo. His face and arms glistened with sweat, his cheeks rosy, like he'd been working out in the heat. He seemed...content. He'd never seen Sanzo look like that.

Gojyo's eyes travelled down as he made to wipe his mouth. His body was languishing in the chair, like the only muscles he was using were the ones in his gun arm. His tight shirt was still bunched up and his abs glistened with sweat. His cock was lying on his thigh, his pants pushed down enough to give it ample space. The pure white skin beckoned from between the bottom hem of the black turtleneck and blue jeans, having the same effect on him as Sanzo's tasty-looking neck peeking out from the turtleneck had earlier. He swallowed automatically and had to resist the urge to shift his hardon in his jeans. By now his whole groin felt on fire. The sight of cum—evidence of Sanzo's pleasure—coating that skin wasn't helping, either. He felt his face light up with a heavy blush. The heat in the room was stifling enough, but now he was also sweaty from the ordeal he'd just been through.

His fingers were sticky from when he wiped his mouth, so he awkwardly wiped them on his jeans. He ran his fingers over the corners of his mouth again and licked his lips. It tasted gross, but he wasn't getting turned off by it like he should be. He was too amped up, he guessed. Sanzo was still staring at him and the silence was suddenly very, very uncomfortable. Did he expect him to say something? Explain himself? With Sanzo staring, he wondered what he looked like. Probably pathetic. He was sweaty and without a shirt, his hair was all tangled from Sanzo's rough treatment, and his pants were tight and stained with precum. He had a lot of sweat on his face too, so he rubbed a hand over his face. "Fuck," he said quietly. He couldn't help it. _This had better be all sweat_ he thought. His eyes felt crusty like he'd been crying.

"Fuck," he said again, quieter. After he rubbed his face he wiped it off on his jeans and sat on his knees, staring at the floor. What was Sanzo waiting for? He almost worked up the courage to say, 'just do it already', when Sanzo finally said something. At the first word, Gojyo flinched, but he was listening like his life depended on it. Which it probably did.

"Clean me up," Sanzo commanded.

Alarmed, Gojyo looked up, stunned. Sanzo sneered and waved his gun teasingly. "Now."

"Wha—what do you mean?" he stuttered, playing dumb. He really didn't want to.

"Don't be an idiot."

"Fuck!" Gojyo said angrily, eyeing the gun and gritting his teeth. He started to reach with his hand with the idea he'd wipe it all off and find a tissue or something, when Sanzo said, "With your tongue."

"Goddamnit Sanzo, c'mon!" he replied angrily, glaring up at the smug bastard.

"You want to die?"

"That ain't funny," Gojyo grumbled before bending down and licking it up. He rebelled by not swallowing it like he knew Sanzo wanted. Now that he wasn't choking or really all that afraid of this relatively mellow Sanzo, and honestly forgetting what started this whole mess, he was now thinking that Sanzo would pay for this treatment later.

When he was done and he was about to get up to get something to spit the fluid into, Sanzo suddenly pounced. The impact knocked Gojyo back. As he felt a body leaning onto him he hurriedly got his legs out from underneath himself and tried to back away. That only served to give Sanzo a seat.

Before Gojyo could comprehend Sanzo sitting ON HIS LAP, which was a _hard _place to sit and couldn't be that comfortable, he felt the monk's lips cover his. He gasped, surprised, and Sanzo's tongue snuck into his mouth. Gojyo's mind went completely blank as he allowed Sanzo to eat his own cum out of his mouth. When he was done, Sanzo hummed into Gojyo's gaping mouth. Gojyo's cock jumped, and he realized Sanzo was close enough to feel it do so. Sanzo pulled back, licking his lips. Gojyo realized he'd done nothing during the kiss and wanted to curse aloud. Instead he only gave Sanzo a second or two to breathe before he grabbed the back of his head and pulled him back into another kiss.

He was gonna die, there was no doubt in his mind. And he was gonna make the most of it. Maybe he was already dead, because Sanzo had just eaten cum out of his mouth. That was just not possible in reality.

So he'd kissed him. And now it was Sanzo's turn at playing dead with his mouth. Gojyo tried in vain to get him to open his mouth, licking at the closed opening, biting and pulling at his lower lip, but to no avail. He gave up, pulling back to look at Sanzo's face. Before he could register the cold anger he saw there, a fist collided into his stomach.

He fell back in part surprise, part pain, and covered his stomach after the fact. Before he could breathe in order to exclaim at the sudden attack, he felt the tip of Sanzo's gun under his chin.

"You fucking pervert bastard!" Sanzo dug the gun into Gojyo's chin angrily.

Gojyo lifted his head back in an attempt to get the pressure of the gun to ease up, but the floor stopped him, and Sanzo's hard gun was digging in mercilessly. What was also hard was his boner and the pressure on it. Sanzo must be putting all his weight on his groin. "Oi, Sanzo—!" he moaned piteously. "Ease up, please!"

Sanzo's face not once hinted at mercy. He rocked his hips forward, making stars explode behind Gojyo's eyes. "Fuh—" Gojyo started, but Sanzo jerked his gun up, snapping his jaw shut and effectively muffling the rest. The kappa's protest turned into an unhappy, wavering groan.

That monk sounded pissed off as he said, "You think you're in a position to ask anything from me? What are you going to ask for next, to fuck me?" He emphasized this by rolling his hips forward, again. Gojyo's groan sounded just as unhappy, which made Sanzo only sneer all the more. Gojyo squeezed his eyes shut. Yeah, he was gonna die now. Any second.

"Or maybe you want me to fuck you?" Sanzo growled. With his eyes closed, Sanzo's voice sounded even scarier. His already deep voice had gotten even more guttural. Gojyo shivered in fear. _No way, no no no! Not cool! _he thought.

Then the gun's pressure eased and Gojyo had access to his jaw. He dared to open one eye to see what Sanzo looked like, but that had been a bad idea. He looked downright evil.

"So? What brand of pervert are you?"

The hanyou knew no matter what he said, Sanzo already had plans for him. He was so frozen in fear, he didn't say anything, just closed his eye again.

After getting no response, Sanzo shouted, "I asked you a fucking question, cockroach!" The sudden sharp slap to his face left Gojyo reeling. He automatically lifted his arms like he'd push Sanzo off, but the gun dug into his skin again and he froze with his hands wrapped around Sanzo's biceps.

The next backhanded slap left him disoriented. He uncurled his fingers from Sanzo's arms and used them to defend his face and make a lame attempt at holding the gun back from digging into his chin again, but failed. Sanzo leaned closer over him until Gojyo could feel his breath on his face. "I will shoot you," he panted angrily.

"D—don't, dude," Gojyo replied, hating himself for stuttering. His head was still turned away from when he'd been slapped and he made no effort to look at Sanzo again. He'd gone completely batshit crazy, and he didn't want to look anymore. He wondered if there was any hope that Hakkai or Goku might come. Probably not, it was late at night. "What d'ya want from me?" Gojyo asked desperately.

That question brought on a moment of awkward silence where Sanzo's shifted weight was not pressing on his groin so much, and warm breath puffed on his face.

"I want you to admit you want me to fuck you, kappa," Sanzo said.

Gojyo glanced at him from the corner of his eye, appalled. "The fuck? Hell no!"

"Admit it, bastard. Why else would you touch a man? Lust after a man?"

Gojyo's head was reeling. His stomach felt sick and churned up. It was true what he'd thought Sanzo must have planned for him. Or maybe he was playing one of his mind games? "You're fucking crazy!" Gojyo snarled.

Sanzo sneered. His face was too close for comfort. Gojyo hoped that at least he wasn't going to shoot him right then or else he'd get a whole hot mess of blood and brains on his face. Maybe it was time to try to get away? But his whole weight was still on him and he did NOT want the gun to go off accidentally as he tried to wrestle him off. Plus his whole body was aching from stress and he didn't know how fast he could move.

"So what, you gonna rape me, you fucking monk? Ain't that against your vows or somethin'?"

Sanzo glared, not amused. "You think I fucking care? Maybe I am crazy, but at least I'm not a pervert like you."

"What the hell? What do you call all this?" Gojyo yelled angrily. "If you're gonna shoot me, just fucking shoot me! Enough already!"

"I always knew you had a death wish," Sanzo sneered, pressing the gun against Gojyo's temple again. He shoved Gojyo's face away from his own. "I'd never stoop so low as to touch someone in their sleep, asshole."

Gojyo closed his eyes. _Oh yeah_. Gojyo put his arms against the wood floor with his elbows bent, like a lying down version of surrender. Mostly, though, it was just a lot more comfortable than guarding his face. He sighed in regret and said, "I'm sorry, Sanzo. I know I deserve it, so just shoot me and get it over with!" Maybe it wasn't a good idea to call his bluff, but this was really getting out of control.

The monk just scoffed, saying in an off-hand manner, "Like I said before, it's because you want me to fuck you. Isn't that it?"

"And I said hell no, prick! I'm not gay! I was just curious, ok?"

The next blow was with the gun this time. Gojyo thought he may have lost consciousness for a moment. His cheekbone was hurting like hell and he didn't feel as much weight on his body anymore. He groaned, then muttered, "Not the face..." But it was already too late. Sanzo must have pistol-whipped him.

"Shut up!" Sanzo chastised. Gojyo groaned again and rubbed his face.

"You are such an asshole," Gojyo lamented as he opened his eyes. Right at that moment he felt the button on his pants pop open. Startled, he watched as Sanzo concentrated on using one hand to open Gojyo's jeans. It was a bit tricky, but Sanzo was managing it.

This was not a good turn of events to Gojyo, since right now pants off meant butt-rape. Understandably he began to freak out, spewing out as much begging and pleas as he could come up with on the spot. He was speaking so fast he didn't even know what he was saying, but Sanzo didn't seem to be listening, anyway.

All those protests degraded into a moan when Sanzo's hand ghosted over his erection through his boxers. As with all actions he'd decided on, Sanzo was blunt and uncompromising. He roughly dragged Gojyo's boner out through the slit in his boxers and began to stroke with a tight grip. There was a bit of precum but it wasn't very well lubricated, so Gojyo had mixed feelings about this. The much needed attention had his body submitting easily, though the roughness made him grimace. As Sanzo's fist tugged on his cock, he couldn't help but wiggle his hips and thrust up into that tightness. He never would have taken Sanzo for a guy who masturbated with his left hand, but he was good with it! Plus, this was hot. Yeah, so the gun was still pointing at him, but Sanzo was stroking his cock and that was good.

He looked with lidded eyes at Sanzo, who stared back at him impassively. _You're not even a little cute_, Gojyo thought, but was too afraid to voice it aloud. He was fully hard and still not even close to coming, and yet Sanzo just kept jacking him off. It was actually getting frustrating... and then Gojyo realized that Sanzo must be messing with him. "Stop it, man. You're just torturing me."

"You don't get anything else until you admit it," Sanzo coldly responded.

"Who says I want anything else!"

Sanzo sneered. "You're still hard."

"That ain't nothing new," Gojyo grumbled. But Sanzo had a point. He didn't know what the hell was wrong with him. Hadn't gotten laid enough recently, maybe. "I'm always fuckin' horny."

"Hnn."

Sanzo's fingers began rubbing over the head of Gojyo's cock and that felt good. It was slick with precum, so it didn't hurt a bit. When Sanzo scraped a nail over his pee hole, Gojyo's whole body shuddered and he didn't even try to stop the moan that rumbled out of his mouth. The fingers didn't stop stroking slowly and Gojyo's breath stuttered at the feeling. It had been way too long and he was so close to begging. He just wanted to come, dammit!

"Sanzo..."

"Shut up."

"San—sanzo, c'mon..."

"I said shut up!" He wouldn't meet his eyes, instead staring at Gojyo's cock as he lightly stroked it.

"I'm dyin' here," Gojyo groaned in dismay.

Gojyo groaned loudly when Sanzo's fingers suddenly left his dick. He looked up and saw Sanzo reaching for the table. Was this his chance? He thought about suddenly lunging and getting the gun, but he took too long to act. Sanzo snatched his pack of cigarettes and lighter in one fist from the tabletop. As he skillfully tapped out one and put his lips around it, Gojyo just stared at him, unable to believe his eyes. Sanzo put the pack next to them on the floor, then flicked on the lighter. The first few puffs of smoke had the kappa licking his lips. He wanted one too, and bad.

"Hey, don't I get one?" Gojyo grinned as he asked.

Sanzo looked at him as he put the lighter on top of the pack of cigarettes next to them. He didn't seem to be forthcoming.

Gojyo shrugged, though that felt strange while lying on the floor. He put his hands back behind his head and rested it on them. The cig would most definitely calm Sanzo down and maybe this would finally be over. He almost jumped out of his skin when he felt the cold press of metal on his wet cock. He gasped, tensed up, and looked down all at once. Sanzo was smoking casually as he ran the rim of the gun barrel over Gojyo's erection. The feeling was weird but arousing somehow. Maybe it was Sanzo's peering eyes as he did this, his lips wrapped around the cig seductively before he breathed out the smoke. Gojyo's cock jumped when it ran over his length again. This was not helping; he already had such a case of blue balls that he thought he might die. Well maybe not, but, hell, was it annoying!

He was feeling somewhat relieved, though. Sanzo didn't seem angry anymore, or at least not more than usual. It didn't seem that he'd get shot today, after all. At least he shouldn't, since he'd given baldy the best orgasm of his whole goddamn life not a few minutes ago.

It was probably a little weird that he wasn't protesting about the gun touching him like that, though. To fill the awkward silence as Sanzo smoked, Gojyo panted resignedly, then said, "I knew you were a kinky bastard."

Did he imagine it, or did Sanzo almost smile right then?

Instead, Sanzo said, "You're one to talk." His voice was lower than normal. And he was making bedroom eyes at Gojyo again.

Oh, hell.

"Uhhh, you wish...?" Gojyo's eyes travelled down Sanzo's body and just as he thought, Sanzo's dick was getting hard again.

He almost jumped out of his skin again when Sanzo's hand suddenly blocked his view. He quickly realized that Sanzo was holding the butt of his cigarette against his lips. Well, that wasn't something he'd refuse. He took a big lungful of delicious smoke and, when Sanzo's hand moved away, blew it out with a sigh of pleasure.

Sanzo took a puff and then said out of nowhere, "So you want to fuck me, then?"

Gojyo blinked. He needed more nicotine before he really felt anything, but even if he had been feeling something that would have been gone with those words.

"Huh?" he said, too surprised to do much else. Maybe he'd been hit harder than he thought and was hearing things.

Sanzo closed his eyes in annoyance and put the cigarette between his lips and left it there. He then reached his hand down and stroked himself. Gojyo gaped at the sight. "His Holiness", on his knees, legs spread, pants down, abs showing, and getting himself harder. A cigarette served to amplify his already obscenely appealing lips, the smoke of it curling around his beautiful face. The tip of the gun still rested against the base of Gojyo's cock. In all of the malformed, sick fantasies that came to Gojyo late at night, he'd never thought of this one, and it had his cock and balls throbbing even more. Damn, but Sanzo did sexy without even trying, and when he did try...

The gun pressed down harder, and the pleasure-pain had Gojyo groaning, mostly to express his discomfort. Sanzo was watching Gojyo taking in the sight and he must have been able to see how much he'd enjoyed it. That was probably why he said, "Pervert."

Gojyo's slow mind finally processed what he'd said before. Did he just offer to let Gojyo fuck him?

"Heey, Sanzo..."

"Shut up. I know what you're going to say, and it isn't happening."

"Wha— You said!"

Sanzo just sneered at him. "Hell no, kappa. It doesn't matter what you want, I'm in control."

"Sadistic fucking bastard. You always were a control freak."

Gojyo took his right hand from behind his head and reached forward. Sanzo's gun dug in harder, which hurt, but he just grunted in pain and ignored it as best he could. He wrapped his hand around Sanzo's hand holding his cock and moved it so that Sanzo was jacking himself off faster. Gojyo was was just trying to show him he wasn't as in control as he thought, but he fully expected worse repercussions than he got: the gun let up on his own dick, and Sanzo allowed him to keep doing it.

Another thrill shot through Gojyo's body and he kept going. He looked in Sanzo's eyes, which were looking down at him. Talking around the cigarette, Sanzo said, "You think you deserve to fuck me, kappa." It wasn't a question, but an accusation.

Gojyo was offended, but he rolled with it. "It ain't about that. It's about who can do who best."

"Do you know how many men have tried to rape me?"

"What?" Gojyo exclaimed, hand going still. No way! And where'd that come from?

Sanzo seemed to have some sort of grim satisfaction in that reaction. He started moving his hand on his own, slower than Gojyo had been, and Gojyo let go. Then Sanzo stated, almost like it made him a bit angry, "But I had a gun. They never expected that. A fully loaded gun can be very persuasive."

Since Gojyo's hand was free, he ignored the presence of Sanzo's loaded and cocked gun near his erection and started stroking his own cock. He frowned and said, "You aren't gonna shoot me. ...And I ain't trying to rape you."

"And you weren't touching me in my sleep before, either."

Gojyo closed his eyes in defeat and sighed. "Hey, I'm sorry about that. And I mean it, I really am. It's not like I wanted you to wake up."

Sanzo pressed the gun against Gojyo's bare chest, over his heart. Gojyo's eyes shot open. Damn, Sanzo looked angry again!

"Whoa!" Gojyo's hand stopped and Sanzo's hand had stopped. Gojyo cursed his choice of words. Thinking fast, the hanyou said, "I said I was sorry!"

Sanzo had one of those big sadistic grins again, and Gojyo slowly moved his left hand from behind his head and tentatively touched Sanzo's wrist. Gojyo winced as he said, "I never meant to hurt you, Sanzo. I...didn't know."

Sanzo's grin faded a little bit, and he glared, asking, "Who can do who better? How much experience do you have doing men?"

"Uh, NONE," Gojyo said, getting angry in spite of the situation. He thought that should be fairly obvious.

Sanzo sneered. "And you think you can do me better?"

"Wha— I have more experience than you!" Gojyo sounded defensive even to his own ears. "Look, I've done plenty of anal with girls. It can't be all that different."

Sanzo gave a long-suffering sigh. "What men like you really want is to get fucked."

Gojyo raised an eyebrow. "Uh, sure, I like a girl to be on top every once in awhile. It don't mean I want to get ass-raped!"

Sanzo's anger indicator was throbbing in his temple. "Yes you do. Push down your pants."

"Wait a damn minute! Haven't you ever heard 'no means no'?"

"'No'? 'No' doesn't mean anything to you, so why should it mean anything to me?" Sanzo said rhetorically.

"Hey! It does!" Gojyo's voice was getting high-pitched as he panicked. "I was only touching. I wasn't going to go that far! I was just curious, okay? It's not like I—"

"Pants. Down. Now!" Sanzo interrupted, growling.

Grudgingly, Gojyo pushed his boxers down and then his pants, wiggling out of both as far as he could from this position. There was enough room to get them off his hips; his cock and balls were showing, and if he was turned around he knew his ass would be. Not a good thing.

Sanzo smoked for a moment, watching him. Gojyo opened his mouth, but snapped it shut again when Sanzo glared. He started tapping his gun on the inside of Gojyo's thigh, and he realized with horror that he must be sensitive there, because his body twitched with each tap. Damn, this was humiliating. He wanted Sanzo, and that unnamed need from before was still there. It must be that keeping him hard.

Sanzo stood up fluidly and, before Gojyo could do or say anything, warned him, "If you try to get away, I _will _shoot you in the back." Gojyo gulped. Sanzo definitely had no qualms shooting youkai in the back, and he was a good enough shot to avoid hitting something fatal, just make it hurt like hell.

Seeing that his threat had worked, Sanzo turned away slightly and put his gun down. He calmly put out his cigarette in the almost-full ashtray on the table and began to disrobe, pulling his shirt over his head and rolling his gloves down his arms.

As he was busy doing that, Gojyo sat up and gingerly touched his cheek; yep, definitely gonna turn into a bruise. He also couldn't help but watch Sanzo getting naked. It was done professionally and with a serious face.

Gojyo scooted back as far as his arms' reach would allow. Without looking at him, Sanzo said, "Take off your pants."

"Hell no! I won't let you—"

"If I have to take them off you, you don't get any lube."

Gojyo gaped at him. "You wouldn't!"

Naked, Sanzo turned and came at him. Gojyo panicked. "Hey wait! Okay, okay, they're coming off!" He quickly kicked them off, focusing really hard on not looking at Sanzo's nude form and failing multiple times. His body was lit up by the moon again, and he looked like some sort of horny angel without wings. Kind of a weird impression to give when you're holding a gun. Gojyo couldn't wrap his mind around the fact that some part of him wanted this. He'd been lusting after Sanzo for so long that it was like a constant thing; he wanted Sanzo bad, and he could finally have him. Well, sort of.

When his pants were off and he was feeling very vulnerable with Sanzo standing over him, there was another span of silence as Sanzo just stared at him. Those cold eyes were intense; he felt a bit like an interesting insect right before it got squished, and maybe that was why he felt queasy. But still, Gojyo enjoyed the attention, cracking a nervous smile; he couldn't help it.

"Get on the bed." Sanzo pointed with the gun at his bed, the one behind Gojyo.

The sudden order broke Gojyo out of his...well, thoughts, he supposed. He'd just been staring back at Sanzo. Rather than follow orders, he stood up, this time towering over Sanzo, and folded his arms. He sounded more confident than he felt as he stated, "Hell no, I don't think you're going to shoot me."

"You're right." Sanzo, serious as can be, threw the gun on the bed Gojyo was standing in front of. Gojyo turned and gaped at the sight of it lying on the bed. After all that, it was over...?

As he was turned away, he felt a huge impact hit him in his stomach and he doubled over. "Bas—tard..." he gritted out, trying to get up. Sanzo had learned his lesson a long time ago and followed up with a smack to the face. When he was partially stumbled over and facing away, Sanzo grabbed his shoulders and Gojyo found himself face down on the bed in a heartbeat. Of course he struggled, but Sanzo held him down firmly. "Damn, fucking shit-head monk... got stronger..." Gojyo said into the blankets, muffled occasionally.

"Keep struggling and I'll beat you to death," Sanzo growled.

Was that another empty threat as usual, or was he serious? He didn't care, there was no way he'd just lay here like this and let Sanzo do whatever. He felt a hot hardness pressing into his backside and that was scary enough.

They wrestled for what felt like forever to Gojyo, but it was only about five minutes. That was enough to leave them both fairly tired; Sanzo was a stubborn bastard, however, and wouldn't give up. They took a couple seconds of rest, though Gojyo was still tensed up and ready for another attack. Then he felt something wrap around both wrists and it tugged, hard. His fought against it, but was no use; whatever it was, it was strong, and he was just cutting into his wrists by struggling. Sanzo tied it tight so that Gojyo's hands were behind his back, like he was being arrested. Gojyo thought that it was sort of fitting, maybe, but it made him angry anyway.

"What the fuck!" he hollered and thrashed. That only served to rub Sanzo's cock against his back, so he quickly stopped. What could he do now? Sanzo's legs had his trapped, and he'd already tried to kick him, which was useless. He finally relented and laid fully on the bed, breathing harshly from the exertion of all this. "Dammit," he muttered.

Sanzo was breathing hard too. Gojyo was listening to it. It wasn't so unfamiliar; panting breaths, warm bodies pressed against one another... But he wasn't supposed to be the one on the bottom! As he was railing against this unfair treatment, he heard a pop, like a flip-top bottle being opened. There was a slick sound, and Gojyo grimaced, raising his head and then flopping it down again, face-first.

He wanted to scream when he felt something wet and slightly cold sliding between his butt cheeks and finding his asshole. What came out was more of a squeak. He thrashed again, but it wasn't really thrashing anymore; more like wiggling. "Dammit," he muttered again, too angry to find anything else to say.

Sanzo said to shut up anyway and proceeded to massage him there. Embarrassingly, it felt good, just as before when girls had done it. _Those had been some good times_, he thought, thinking back. _They were so kinky. That one blond with big tits, oh yeah, we were locked in my place for two days..._

No matter how much he tried to think about something else, he kept coming back to what Sanzo was slowly doing to his rear end. He was going infuriatingly slow, so that it didn't really feel good but it was still a turn-on. Similar to when women would tease your cock with the tip of their tongue. Ah damn, thinking about girls doing that was turning him on more. Before Sanzo finally got done with prep and—well, he'd probably come before he'd get very far.

Then, to Gojyo's part dismay and relief, he slid a finger inside. There was a pause in which Gojyo thought about how much this sucked and how he'd get Sanzo for this. The finger started to move, slowly at first, and then more forcefully. Gojyo flinched, surprise flooding him at the sensation. It was uncomfortable, but GOOD.

As it wiggled around, Gojyo could smell gun oil. The smell was familiar; Sanzo often cleaned his gun, and he could also smell like it for awhile afterward. At first he thought that it was Sanzo smelling that way, but when he realized he hadn't smelled it earlier—thinking about earlier made his dick surge—he concluded it was...the lube Sanzo was using! He was so incredulous he mumbled, "What the—?"

Sanzo either didn't hear him or ignored him, however. A second finger was added, which made Gojyo tense up again. But by now Gojyo didn't have any protests. This felt _good_. He supposed that made sense, since girls were into it. He'd learned that once the muscles were relaxed, she'd be all into it.

All thinking stopped when Sanzo's fingers hit something inside him. He groaned, his hips bucking on their own. He pulled at his bonds, his fingers twitching and trying to grab at Sanzo's hands behind him. He wasn't sure what he would do if he did get a good grip; his mind was too scattered to think straight. Sanzo hummed, and continued to hit that spot, over and over.

Soon Gojyo was sweating even more profusely and cursing into the mattress. He was gonna come, except that it was too strong of a pleasure and he found he couldn't. Then Sanzo removed his fingers, at which Gojyo moaned at the feeling, and replaced it with something much larger. Gojyo's eyes got wide, and he pushed his hips forward to try to get away. Of course that rubbed his erection against the bed, which made his body shiver. His whole body felt like it was on fire, whether from the heat of the room or pleasure he wasn't sure, and his mind was too hazy to fight back anymore.

Somehow Sanzo's cock slipped inside a little bit. Gojyo moaned, in what he hoped sounded like anger or dismay. He thought he'd feel pain, like he was being torn apart, but it didn't hurt at all. It just felt strange to have something so big in there. After a moment it went in a bit further, then waited. Gojyo was trying his best to keep breathing and didn't do much else during this process. Eventually Sanzo got it as far as it would go, and Gojyo thought it felt...really good. He felt full, but not full like after a big meal, but like completeness. Did women feel this way during sex? It was intense.

Hands he hadn't noticed were pushing him down then moved to his hips and held him a bit off the bed. Gojyo found the floor with his toes and steadied himself. It was more comfortable than where his feet had been before, that's why.

"Ugnnn," he said when Sanzo pulled back a bit and then thrust again. Why did that feel good? Sanzo began to slowly move back and forth inside him, which was made slick with gun oil. Damn, he wanted Sanzo to hit that pleasure spot again. Right when he was thinking that, Sanzo shifted around like he was getting comfortable, maybe, and then that blinding pleasure hit the hanyou full-on. He wasn't sure what he did; in fact, he moaned loudly and quietly said, "There!" All Gojyo was aware of was that Sanzo kept hitting that spot, and it felt better than before because there was friction over the whole spot. His body rocked with Sanzo on its own, and he was moaning and he knew it.

It was too good; he didn't think he could come like that. His pride was stopping him from looking at Sanzo, like that would hide how much he wanted more. But really, how much pride did he have left after getting butt-fucked and liking it? So, for the first time since his hands had been tied, he turned his torso and looked back. Not a particularly comfortable move with his hands tied behind his back and hips held in position by the monk, but he could see Sanzo, and he was as clear as day with the moon shining through the window like that. His mouth was parted in pleasure and his muscles were taut and glistening with sweat. His eyes were intently focused on Gojyo's face and they stared at each other for a moment. Gojyo could feel himself twitching around the cock because it kept feeling like there was resistance as Sanzo thrusted. Perhaps that was what prompted Sanzo to remove his hand from Gojyo's hip and use it to push Gojyo's head flat on the bed. Now he was forced to stare at the wall again.

Gojyo moaned, "You bastard." He panted a moment, but Sanzo kept him like that. "Sanzo... Fuck Sanzo, it feels good." He moaned after he said that, closing his eyes and bucking his hips. Sanzo's breath hitched, which made it all that much better. He started thrusting faster and Gojyo grunted quietly with each hit on his prostate. He wiggled, trying to get his arms free, but it was no use. Sanzo was a little too good at tying knots, which was very suspicious. "Untie my hands, please," Gojyo groaned, pushing at Sanzo's relentless hand with his head. He wiggled his numb fingers and bucked. He was much larger than Sanzo and could probably push him off, or at least prevent him from fucking him so smoothly as he was right now.

Sanzo hissed through his teeth but didn't stop. So Gojyo wrapped his limber legs around his thighs and held him tight. Sanzo tried to open them but his arms were no match for Gojyo's legs, and he was fully recovered from wrestling earlier. Gojyo shifted so he could see his face again, giving him his best honest, lusty look. "Untie me, bastard!"

Damn, but the monk looked completely delicious. He must have been close to orgasm, because his expression was unguarded and he was breathing hard. His thumbs were drawing nonsense patterns on Gojyo's thighs now as he seemed to ponder it. Then with steady fingers he worked on the knot in the sash that was holding Gojyo's wrists together.

Gojyo didn't release him until his arms were holding him up by the elbows and some feeling was back in his fingers. Despite being free, Sanzo stayed like that for a moment more. Gojyo refused to say anything, but he did push back on the erection filling him just a little bit as he reached below his stomach and gripped his hard-on. He shivered and groaned, and that was all the prompting Sanzo needed. The pounding was merciless this time, and Gojyo's orgasm came rushing in; that pressure on his prostate added to the fast pace he jacked himself off at had him coming.

"Oh, fuck! Yes, fuck yes," Gojyo moaned while he came, his orgasm ripping through him like it never had before. He collapsed completely on the bed as he felt his cum spraying over the sheets and his chest. He was still shaking with the aftermaths when Sanzo pulled out. A moment later there was a sexy grunt—yes, sexy, Gojyo had no idea a guy's grunt could sound like that—and he felt streaks of hot cum landing on his back and ass. He was feeling too good to care much, but Sanzo would pay for that. _Dammit_.

The Buddhist monk leaned over him and breathed harshly. After a few moments be moved away. Gojyo, still immobile from the best orgasm (almost) ever—maybe ever—continued to lie there. When he heard the snick of a lighter, however, he pushed himself up and looked bleary-eyed at Sanzo. He was standing naked near the table and smoking. He wasn't looking at Gojyo, just at the wall. Maybe he was lost in memories. Gojyo sat on the bed for a good minute. He ached all over, and he was having an intense nicotine craving, and at the same time he wasn't sure his legs would work. He used the already dirtied sheet to wipe off all the cum on himself and then walked on steady—dammit, they weren't steady—legs to his stuff. With shaking hands he got out a cig and lit it. The first few puffs were pure bliss.

His ass was hurting now. He knew his back was bent, trying to relieve that pain a little. He sucked down that cigarette quickly and lit another one. Able to focus more clearly now he decided he should probably sit down. He almost yelped at the flareup of pain that caused, so he laid back carefully and continued smoking. The rustling of cloth met his ears, a sound so familiar he didn't even have to guess what it was. Sanzo was getting dressed. _So you're the fuck and leave type, Sanzo-_sama_?_

He quickly got up and stalked over to Sanzo's bed. The gun was still lying there, though just barely; their wrestling had moved it to the edge of the bed. He picked it up and fiddled a moment until he figured out how to pop the chamber out. He looked into the gun grimly. Completely loaded.

"Get your filthy hands off my gun, cockroach," Sanzo intoned. Well, that was playing nice according to Sanzo, but Gojyo was pretty pissed off at the whole situation that just went down. He popped the chamber back in and spun it just for kicks. Then he fit his long fingers around the gun. It was so small. More fit for a kid than an adult, he thought. He faced Sanzo and pretended to point it at Sanzo. Once the slight shock registered on his face, Gojyo grinned and threw it up in the air and caught it by the handle. "Just kidding," he said, still with a cheeky grin. He threw it to Sanzo, who caught it easily and quickly tucked it in his pants, glaring all the while.

"I don't need a gun, shitty monk. I get along just fine with my fists and shakujou." He forced a smile.

Sanzo seemed to catch on to the threat because he snorted. "Tell me how that works out for you," he sneered and headed for the door.

"Where you goin'?" Gojyo asked, trying to keep the growl out of his voice. He was curious, but it was also kind of annoying that the guy was leaving. The moon was still out, so he couldn't possibly want to leave, or think there was anything to do outside this room.

Sanzo ignored him, of course. Gojyo hissed in frustration when the door shut behind him. He paced the room, smoking furiously.

By the time Sanzo got back Gojyo was back in his sullied pants and lying on the bed, anxiety-ridden. The night was just starting to fade; he was familiar with the change in light. It was his signal to start off for home from the bar, back when he lived in Chang'an. Of course Sanzo strutted in like he owned the place, completely unfazed. Gojyo stared at Sanzo's wet hair as he put his gun under his pillow. The monk then started throwing the dirty blankets on the floor, after which he walked over to the table at the foot of Gojyo's bed and lit up another cigarette.

The windows had been open the entire time in an attempt at getting some cool air in the sweaty room, so the smoke should have dissipated. But it hadn't; Gojyo just couldn't seem to get enough nicotine. Sanzo didn't seem concerned about adding to the cloud hanging over them.

Gojyo got up. A bath was a good idea; why he didn't realize Sanzo was doing that, he wasn't sure. He couldn't think straight. He wanted to get up and punch Sanzo; he wanted to cuss him out; he wanted to kiss him; he wanted to fuck him. Instead, he got up and headed for the door to go take a bath, too.

As he got close to the door, Sanzo said, "Don't come back."

When Gojyo turned, startled, he saw Sanzo standing with his arms partly folded and lean-sitting on the table. His cigarette dangled from his fingers, and he took another drag as he glared back at Gojyo with a "you heard me" look on his face.

"What?" Gojyo grunted, trying to conceal his anger.

"I said, get out of my room and don't come back."

"Fine!" Gojyo shouted and left, slamming the door behind himself.

In the bathhouse, alone, and scrubbing himself all over—he did NOT want Goku to smell anything on him tomorrow, that would just be the worst; or hell, _Hakkai_ smelling it, which would be even worse!—he had a lot to time to think. Once he was all squeaky clean he knew exactly what he was going to do.

He went straight back to the room and charged in, being sure to close and lock the door behind him. Sanzo sat up like he'd been given an electric shock and was aiming his gun at Gojyo. "I thought I said—" he shouted. But Gojyo wasn't listening. He was over there before he could finish his sentence, grabbed the gun hand by the wrist and the other one that tried to punch him and held them down on the bed. This forced Sanzo to lay back flat, grimacing at the roughness. Then Gojyo kissed him. Right on his unwary lips.

He had planned to ravage his mouth, but once his lips were smooshed to Sanzo's surprisingly soft ones, the anger left him. Sanzo, however, tensed considerably and made an angry noise in his throat. Gojyo kept a rigid hold on the man, making sure to keep his arms pinned. He had the advantage of strength, after all. He kissed him delicately, finding Sanzo's lips just as appealing as they looked. He couldn't help the moan that rumbled in his throat when he fully comprehended who he was kissing, whose mouth he was enjoying so much. _This is worth everything I've gone through tonight._

Then Sanzo pressed back, and even opened his mouth slightly. Gojyo's mind stopped working; all he could do was moan, though he sounded more surprised than pleased. After a moment of hesitation, he couldn't help but tease the opening with his tongue. Sanzo shivered beneath him, and Gojyo took the cue. He only prodded lightly, tasting him: Malboros and the tea he always drank. Gojyo had just known that's what he would taste like, but actually tasting it was a completely different experience than imagining it.

Finally he withdrew, and opened his eyes slightly. Sanzo's face when he was turned on was the most wanton thing Gojyo thought he'd ever see, and seeing it again was an unexpected treat. The monk's eyes were at half-mast, his cheeks seeming to hold a blush, and his lips were swollen and wet. He looked even cuter than after his orgasm. All Gojyo wanted to do was kiss him again, but he thought that was enough. He'd been punished enough for one night. So he slowly let go, leaving Sanzo on the bed. He ignored the sound of the gun rattling slightly as Sanzo raised it.

That was it; he was done. He turned away and walked over to his stuff. What he was going to do now was a mystery, maybe share a bed with Hakkai if he'd let him. Once he had everything together and was ready to leave, he looked over at Sanzo. Sanzo, sitting on the edge of his bed, was still holding the gun up, but he looked too ill at ease to actually use it. Gojyo had no idea what the priest would be thinking right now, or how he'd handle this. He had started for the door when he was halted by a shocked voice.

"What—was that?" Sanzo demanded to know. Gojyo looked at him, hand on the knob, and shrugged as he answered, "It was a kiss."

"WHY?" Sanzo forced out, almost shouting.

Gojyo raised an eyebrow and very carefully said, "Because I wanted to?"

Sanzo did not know how to react to this. On the one hand he was angry at a pervert taking advantage over him in any way, but he was also kind of flattered. Kissing was different than shooting lewd grins at him—or touching him in his sleep. Somehow he got the sense that Gojyo had told him something with that kiss, but he had no idea what it could be. He must be imagining things… _Gojyo is just a pervert!_

"Tch," Sanzo finally said, dropping his arm and turning toward the window.

Gojyo sighed in relief and turned the doorknob. As he was getting his body ready to move out the door, he was halted yet again by Sanzo's voice. "Where do you think you're going?"

Gojyo, exasperated, turned around and said, "I'm fucking leaving, droopy-eyes!"

"Whatever. I paid for two beds, and your lazy ass better use it or I'll kill you."

Wow. He didn't think he'd ever admit it, but this was Sanzo's version of an apology. At least, Gojyo thought it could be, because he didn't think he'd ever heard Sanzo countermand one of his own orders so bluntly. Those were words he couldn't refuse; he'd been ready to leave, maybe for good. But after that kiss, and after those words, he didn't want to.

Gojyo shut the door, muttering, "Bastard can't make up his mind." If Sanzo heard, he didn't act like it. Gojyo looked at Sanzo uncertainly for a moment before quietly walking to his bed.

It was better not to tease him, but it was so hard not to. He threw his stuff beside his bed and took a smoke out. Gojyo sighed as he got his lighter. When he turned around, his jaw dropped. The asshole had beat him to it. He was currently puffing on a cigarette and sitting facing the window. The smoke drifted out, disappearing into the early morning air. Gojyo caught the smell with his next breath and was reminded of how Sanzo's mouth tasted.

His hands shook as he lit up his smoke. The first inhale was pure heaven, of course. He closed his eyes and moaned low in his throat. He puffed a few breaths, then made his way to the window and pointedly blew a lungful of smoke out of it. Sanzo cut his eyes at him, but didn't say anything.

They smoked in not so companionable silence, but it was normal enough where Gojyo thought back to all the times they had done something similar. It was always so calm when they smoked together.

Gojyo flicked his cigarette out of the window and wondered what he was going to do. It was too awkward now. Maybe Sanzo could act all calm and collected, but Gojyo thought his head was going to split open. Besides thinking about what he was going to do after his bath, he'd been wondering how getting it up the ass could feel so good, and how did he not know that before now... and how Sanzo, of all people, could be the one to show him. He glanced at Sanzo, still smoking, though he looked to be almost done. In his mind he asked him, _'Hey, you want me to return the favor, baldy?'_ He didn't realize he was grinning until Sanzo was staring at him. He quickly straightened his face and retreated to his bed.

After he laid down he fully entertained the thought. But damn, the chilly priest would look un-fucking-believe sucking dick and getting it himself.

After Gojyo went to bed Sanzo stretched out. He was really sleepy now and his body ached from all the physical exertion. He'd never had an easy time falling asleep, and the events of the past hour had him feeling more uneasy. What would stop the perv from doing the same thing all over again? _Why didn't I wake up when he had started undressing me, or when he'd started fondling me?_ He'd woken up before youkai could kill him, and they were certainly quieter than Gojyo was. Was he that used to the kappa being around?

_Shit. _Why hadn't he noticed how Gojyo felt? All the other perverts had made it impossible to miss how they felt. But Gojyo had never touched him inappropriately up until now. Sure, he was constantly making innuendo and blatantly touching him, but those were just empty words, just an attempt at trying to get on Sanzo's nerves. _That's what I thought, but perhaps I was wrong._

On the other bed, the thoughts weren't so different. The past hour was revolving around and around in Gojyo's head and though he felt relaxed, it was impossible to sleep.

It was going to be a long couple of hours until dawn for the both of them.

* * *

**Author's Note:**

A bit of what inspired the characterization I presented in this story:

Their pasts are pretty fucked up. Sanzo was about to be raped by the first person he killed, and it isn't shown in the manga but he was probably assaulted multiple times after that. The dude wandered around alone for *four years*. So, the attention he probably got would make anyone surly. That rage is usually brought about by either loudness (he prefers the quiet, and he can't stand the noisy talking of the ikkou most of the time) or pervertedness (men he doesn't know hitting on him, even when women hit on him!). I thought that it would be totally in-character if he used some of that rage against those who try to rape him (or hit on him). I'm sure he's got some needs of his own to take care of, and who better than to hurt those who want to hurt him? He definitely believes in revenge, in some small way; "payback's a bitch" and all that :D

As for Gojyo, he's a well-known pervert. He even (subtly) flirts with Sanzo and Hakkai. He gets overly defensive when anyone alludes to him being gay in any way... I swear homophobes have bisexual or gay tendencies and that's why they are so offended. So that's where the inspiration for his actions came from.

Also, I looked it up and apparently gun oil can be used to masturbate (there's even a "gun oil" lube on the market, supposedly inspired by this fact) and I thought... ok, why not? :D


	2. Asleep Old Version

Title: Asleep

Category: Anime/Manga » Saiyuki

Author: Hang Him Higher

Language: English, Rating: Rated: M

Genre: General

Published: 05-24-09, Updated: 08-06-10

Chapters: 5, Words: 19,094

* * *

Chapter 1: Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don't own Saiyuki, nor do I make money from writing this.

Sanzo was breathing slowly and deeply, chest rising and lowering in the rhythm of sleep. It was hot in the room, and he'd kicked off most of his blankets in his sleep, but was still wearing his robes. They were tangled loosely around his body.

Gojyo was standing over Sanzo's bed, watching him quietly. He looked so serene; Gojyo knew better, though. But still. The man was so goddamn PRETTY. Even with his unique purple eyes hidden from view, he was quite the sight. His skin was pale, practically glowing in the moonlight, and the way his hair was shining made it seem more white than blonde. Gojyo shifted his hands around in his pockets, contemplating.

It was tempting. He'd like to attribute it to still being drunk, or even tipsy, but he hadn't had much tonight. He'd been more intent on the women at the bar than the alcohol. Unsuccessful—or, more accurately, no one measured up to his standards—he'd thought he'd call it an early night and head back to the room. Sanzo had been asleep when he'd arrived. He'd crept around quietly, taking off his shoes, then his shirt because it was fucking hot, and getting his bed ready. Then Sanzo had shifted, and Gojyo had casually looked at him.

But he couldn't stop, once he'd started. He even found his body moving closer, automatically drawn to the sight. The small window had no shade, and the moonlight lit the room with silver and gray. In that odd light, Sanzo looked even paler and ethereal. Beautiful.

Gojyo could no longer resist the temptation. The hanyou reached out and lightly put his fingers on the bare skin of Sanzo's upper neck. He could feel blood pumping underneath his fingers, and the skin was warm. So, Sanzo had a heart after all. Gojyo smirked at the thought. His fingers trailed down and over the black turtleneck. It was smooth, and warm.

His control completely left him. He found himself untying the sash, carefully. His fingers found the edges of the robe and pulled the cloth back, revealing the tight black shirt and Sanzo's tight jeans. The light afforded him an estimation of Sanzo's curves and dips. He'd seen Sanzo shirtless, mostly naked even, but it had never hit him like it was now, and he wasn't even naked yet. Sanzo, asleep and vulnerable, unaware... Gojyo gulped.

Instead of deterring him, the thought turned him on. He felt his pants get tighter by the second as he traced those contours with his fingertips, cursing the shirt for being in the way of feeling the flesh directly. He rubbed where he could barely make out one of Sanzo's nipples by how the light played over the black fabric. Sanzo shifted, almost imperceptibly, breath stuttering. His breath then resumed that steady up and down cadence, and Gojyo knew he was still asleep. Gojyo teased it more, watching Sanzo as his breath continued to hitch, fingers twitching; it was not enough to wake him, but enough to run a thrill up Gojyo's spine.

He ran a few fingertips down Sanzo's chest. When he reached the edge where the black shirt and jeans met he slid those fingers stealthily under the bottom hem. He could feel the fine hairs on Sanzo's stomach and he felt heat pooling strongly in his lower regions. There was no way he could stop without seeing more of Sanzo. Maybe if he could see more, his curiosity and arousal would be satisfied.

Carefully, watching for any signs of rousing, Gojyo pushed the tight shirt up Sanzo's chest, baring more and more skin. He managed to get it up past Sanzo's nipples. With the tight shirt bunched up by Sanzo's collarbone, Gojyo took a step back to admire his work. Sanzo was still breathing deeply, asleep. Gojyo watched the toned chest and abdomen rise and fall with his breath. Even as relaxed as he was, he was like a fucking marble statue; so goddamn pale and PRETTY. His nipples stood out a darker shade of gray in the light; the contrast definitely drew his eyes. Gojyo couldn't remember ever seeing them before; they were just some boring guy nipples, right? But right now, he found his mouth watering as he stared at those pert nubs of flesh, just begging to be touched and suckled.

While Gojyo found the idea of "suckling" Sanzo really strange—he could have chosen a better word—he chalked it up to the fact that he was so used to women. Now women, _those_ nipples were meant to be "suckled"… Sanzo's were meant to be _teased_. Oh yeah. Much better choice of wording.

Even with these thoughts floating through his head, Gojyo just hovered over him, taking it all in. He was hesitating and he knew it. He wanted to taste Sanzo so bad, wanted to feel his flesh with his tongue. It was so much more sensual and intimate that way. While he hesitated a brief sliver of doubt and guilt wormed its way in to his psyche. What the hell was he doing?

Then Sanzo shifted, fingers grabbing absently at his bunched up shirt and tugging weakly. They then let go and shifted slightly so his hand was resting on his bare stomach. He groaned in his sleep a little bit, turned his face more toward the window, and then resumed sleeping peacefully.

Gojyo let go of the breath he didn't know he was holding. He found his body moving of its own accord. Slowly and carefully he leaned down and stuck out his tongue, then smoothed it over the nipple closest to him. It had gone soft again after being neglected so long, but it began to harden under the pressure of the slick muscle. Sanzo sighed. Feeling safe he wouldn't wake, Gojyo continued licking it, going so far as to suck on it. It got hard almost immediately in his mouth, and Gojyo found it wasn't too bad; not _that _different than a woman's, but smaller. Gojyo had to resist moaning at the taste, of finally tasting Sanzo.

As he continued to play with the hardened nub with his teeth and lips and tongue, Sanzo began breathing faster, shifting almost imperceptibly. When his sigh sounded almost like a moan, Gojyo rose up and reached out his hand to play with the other one. Sanzo's face looked a little darker, as if he was blushing. His breathing was faster, but he seemed to still be asleep. Seeing Sanzo like this was making Gojyo's cock ache, and he had to resist another moan.

Gojyo smiled and ran his fingertips over Sanzo's chest again, this time able to enjoy it without anything in the way. And it was really nice. Gojyo found he didn't miss breasts on this body as much as he thought he would. His skin was soft and warm, which came as unexpected to Gojyo. When he touched sensitive spots, watched in amazement as Sanzo reacted. Each time, he felt his own breath hitch, blood rushing to his groin. This was really turning him on a lot more than he thought it would.

He wondered if Sanzo was hard. He placed his hand on Sanzo's crotch area and felt it lightly. Yeah, felt like it was getting a little hard. Gojyo carefully, oh so carefully, undid the button and pulled the zipper down. Sanzo's manhood was right there, no boxers in the way. Gojyo found himself staring at it. He didn't want to touch it, really, found the idea a little gross; but he did want those little reactions again, wanted something he couldn't really fathom. Before he thought better of it he reached into the fly of Sanzo's jeans until he was touching it hesitantly, and Sanzo tensed, breath hitching. He watched Sanzo's face as he stroked his fingertips over the soft flesh, felt it twitch beneath them. Sanzo's eyebrows came closer together, wrinkling his face a little. Unlike when he did that awake and angry, it was actually a little cute right now.

As Gojyo went, his confidence increased, thinking Sanzo wouldn't wake up. His touches got stronger, more self-assured. Sanzo was getting pretty hard, still mostly trapped in his jeans. The hanyou's fingers slid down Sanzo's full length, settling on the head. Precum greeted his touches and he rolled his forefinger over the drops. This got a really strong reaction that Gojyo wasn't anticipating. Sanzo made a little "ah" sound, back arching and arms tensing. His cock twitched and got harder. Then Sanzo woke up.

Gojyo quickly retreated as he saw his eyes opening, but Sanzo was too fast. He grabbed Gojyo's wrist, eyes opening more fully and blinking, focusing on the dim room. He stared at Gojyo, who he held in a death grip, looking puzzled for a moment. Then he sat up and looked down. His expression changed quick as lightning and he glared up at Gojyo with a very scary, unfathomable look.

"Uh," Gojyo squeaked, panicking now. "...I can explain?"

With his free hand, Sanzo reached under the pillow. In another moment, Sanzo had his gun trained on Gojyo. Gojyo stared at Sanzo with wide eyes, only able to think, _Oh shit, now I'm dead_. He should have remembered that Sanzo kept his gun under his pillow most nights. He should have not even done this shit in the first place. Why, WHY had he done it? He was frozen in shock, unsure of what Sanzo would do.

Sanzo sat up more fully, still achingly silent, just staring at Gojyo. Slowly, his fingers uncoiled from Gojyo's wrist. He used that hand to throw his loose robes over his open fly. Once finished, he opened his mouth like he was going to say something. Then he shut it again. Instead, his thumb pulled back the hammer of his gun and his forefinger settled comfortably on the trigger.

"Whoa, wait Sanzo! I-"

"Shut up!" That growled command shut Gojyo up so fast he bit his tongue. His eyes watered from the pain, but he kept his mouth shut as ordered.

Sanzo's next growled words made him jump. "Get over here."

Puzzled, Gojyo moved up against the side of the bed. "Closer!" Gojyo bent down, face reddening at his proximity to Sanzo. He could feel the heat radiating off the monk, feel his ragged breaths on his face. Remembering how he'd been feeling that heat while the man slept, Gojyo blushed heavier.

Sanzo lay back down and pressed the gun to Gojyo's temple. Gojyo came out of his thoughts with a shock. He watched wide-eyed as Sanzo moved; his free hand shoved his robes off of his partially nude form, then pushed his jeans down until his erection was free.

"What-?" Gojyo started, watching this happen with a sick feeling growing in his stomach. The metal pressed to his temple was softened by his hair, but he could still feel the cold steel, the very deadly threat, pressing into his skin. And his eyes were drawn to the hard rod of flesh jutting from Sanzo's body lewdly. He didn't notice his tongue darting out to wet his lips. But Sanzo did.

Thrusting the gun against Gojyo's head roughly, pushing it, he growled, "Get down there."

Gojyo, gulping, leaned down until his face was right next to Sanzo's erection. There he froze, thoughts racing fast and heart beating faster. He realized he was scared shitless, not just because of the gun but because he'd been caught, and now Sanzo was right in front of his face and—"Um," he said stupidly.

"Shut up and suck me off. You started this."

"B—but, Sanzo...!"

Sanzo ground the gun into his head where he was currently resting it, behind Gojyo's ear. Gojyo's breath quickened. He couldn't! Would Sanzo shoot him? Really?

"Do it!" Sanzo growled. His voice brooked no argument. Gojyo was convinced he'd really shoot him this time—he'd really fucked up—and it was better to do as he was told. Not that he hadn't done it before, but he'd been young and drunk at the time. It wasn't something he'd wanted to do since, and certainly never imagined doing to Sanzo. But he really didn't want to die.

He grabbed the base of Sanzo's cock and guided it to his mouth. His hand and lips trembled as he put his lips against the head. Sanzo sighed in pleasure, and Gojyo felt a little emboldened by that. He opened his mouth and slid the velvety flesh inside. Then he sucked. Sanzo's hips bucked and his gun hand shook; he could hear it rattle right next to his ear. Sanzo's breath was quick again, sucking in a breath as Gojyo took in more. When Gojyo made to retreat after only taking in an inch, Sanzo put his free hand on his head and pressed. "Take it all in," he said in an equally shaky voice. He shoved hard, pressing Gojyo down until his cock was almost all the way in. Surprised, Gojyo gagged, trying to back up, but the press of Sanzo's hand and gun was insistent. He coughed around it, but tried suppressing the reaction and sucked.

"Oh fuck," Sanzo hissed, hips thrusting up into Gojyo's hot, wet mouth. His arm weakened, and Gojyo pulled back, getting enough of the cock out of his mouth to breathe and cough. Once he was recovered, he went back down without prodding. He began sucking in a rhythmic up and down cadence. The gun stayed trained on him, but Sanzo's hand let go. He couldn't see anything from his position, so he listened intently for any sign of his impending death, or praise if he was so lucky. Sanzo panted loudly, partially drowned out by the sound of the sucking of Gojyo's mouth. The slick sound filled Gojyo's ears and he felt his face burning and his groin throbbing resolutely against his pants. As the minutes dragged by, his jaw began to ache and he was too afraid to move in any other way than he currently was. And his balls were going to explode if he didn't get some goddamn relief. This, he concluded, was torture.

Sanzo's cock began getting bigger and harder, making his job even more difficult. He could taste a sweetness along with the saltiness now, and he thought it wasn't too bad of a taste.

To his amazement he was finding more and more that despite everything he was enjoying this. Sanzo's little gasps and moans and hip pivots made it all worth it. He felt confident enough to swirl his tongue around Sanzo's head, and was rewarded by a surprised moan that was rather loud in the small room.

His confidence returned, he slid the cock out of his mouth with a slick pop. Sanzo shifted the gun against his head, but he had no intention of stopping. His jaw was hurting too badly. He tried instead running his firm lips along Sanzo's erection. Sanzo gasped and went limp.

Before he could slip the dick back into his mouth, Sanzo grabbed his hair and pulled him off. He got off the bed, his fist still in Gojyo's hair, and dragged the kappa across the floor by it. Gojyo gritted his teeth, enduring the treatment silently—Sanzo still had the gun. Sanzo stopped at the lone chair in their room, beside the tiny table which held Sanzo's newspaper. He let go of Gojyo roughly so he could move the chair to face the room. Gojyo made not a sound, instead choosing to use the momentary break to flex his jaw and swallow the taste in his mouth. Before sitting down the monk shrugged off his robe. When he was settled in the chair he watched Gojyo, who was kneeling where he'd left him. Gojyo wondered what he must look like; he couldn't help the pained expression on his face. His cock was really hurting, but he was too afraid to touch it with Sanzo staring at him.

Then Sanzo beckoned Gojyo with his gun and Gojyo swallowed hard before moving closer. Once he was close enough, the gun was returned to its place on his temple, and Sanzo's other hand guided his head toward his erection. Gojyo sucked it in, and Sanzo pushed him down again. He heard himself whine as it tried to choke him, and felt the flesh in his mouth twitch.

Now, Gojyo was a good lover. He was attentive, and experienced—he'd spent many a night with various women, learning what they preferred. He was not only apt in this field, but enjoyed giving the most pleasure—priding himself on it, really. So, when he noticed this reaction from Sanzo, he continued to do it. The worst off he sounded, the more it seemed to turn Sanzo on.

_Fucking sadist_, he thought in his head, but did it anyway. The sooner this ended, the better; his jaw hurt, his cock and balls hurt, and the gun trained on his head was leaving a permanent ring in his scalp.

Soon Sanzo's cock thickened and his hips rolled, shoving it deeper in Gojyo's mouth. Gojyo sucked harder, knowing well what those reactions meant. And then he remembered that Sanzo was holding a cocked gun to his head, which, during his orgasm, might be triggered by Sanzo's twitchy finger. He cried out, muffled by the hot rod in his mouth, in panic. He tried to retreat, to get access to his throat so he could speak, but Sanzo gripped his hair harder and kept him still as he thrust into Gojyo's now futilely resisting mouth.

Gojyo whimpered in panic, squeezing his eyes shut. Sanzo, voice heavy with his heightened pleasure, growled, "I'm coming, and you'll take every last—oh, fuck—last drop, understand? I'll fucking shoot you if you make, aahh... uh—a mess."

Gojyo sobbed at this. How was he not supposed to make a mess? He had no idea how he'd bring himself to swallow, and he'd probably gag, and then spit it out... Either way, Sanzo was probably going to shoot him as he came. The hanyou wasn't acting anymore; he was really panicking. The more whimpering and sobbing he did, however, the more Sanzo was getting off, and soon he felt a squirt of come go down his throat. He swallowed automatically, then closed his throat as more filled his mouth. More than anything though, he heard Sanzo moan deliriously. That sound went straight to his own flagging cock, which came back full force.

Sanzo's grip relaxed and Gojyo hurriedly pulled back, eliciting a soft gasp from the monk as his softening cock was pulled roughly out. Gojyo snapped his mouth shut, remembering the threat about making a mess. He knelt there, staring at Sanzo, feeling the cum rest in his mouth. He didn't want to swallow—that was something only really kinky _chicks_ did, man!-and he didn't want to spit and piss Sanzo off. The gun was still trained on him, though it had relaxed until it pointed at his neck.

His discomfort over these facts fell back in his mind in comparison to the sight before him. Sanzo, shirt still uncomfortably bunched on his upper torso, with rosy cheeks and half-lidded eyes, was breathing hard—and utterly _content_ looking. The first thought that popped into Gojyo head was, 'Damn, he's sexy.' Next was, 'Did I cause that?'

They sat like that for a moment as Sanzo came down from his temporary high. When those purple eyes, appearing black in the dark room, fixed on him, Gojyo almost gulped before he remembered the cum in his mouth. "Swallow it," Sanzo ordered, lazily raising the gun. Gojyo's mouth moved automatically at the order. It was more than he'd thought, and he choked slightly, and started coughing. Eyes watering, he clutched his throat and, in a delayed reaction, wiped at his mouth with the back of his wrist.

"Sanzo, uh..." Gojyo stared, but looking at Sanzo now completely seized up his vocal cords. He cleared his throat and licked his lips, looking away. That was when something hit his chest, hard, and he fell back violently onto the floor. He clutched at the impact spot, glaring up at Sanzo. "What was that for?" he shouted. Sanzo stood, pointing his gun at the kappa the whole time.

Then Sanzo lifted his foot and placed it firmly on Gojyo's crotch. "Whoa, hey!" Gojyo shouted, body quivering at the much-needed contact but not enjoying the context of it. Sanzo's toes curled and he shoved the arch of his foot hard. Gojyo gasped, back arching off the floor. "Hey... Ahh," Gojyo said lamely.

"You... you fucking pervert!" Sanzo hissed, gun arm shaking. His whole body began to shake with rage. With each following emphasized word, Sanzo shoved his foot hard, smashing Gojyo's erection mercilessly between his foot and Gojyo's body. "You horny, touchy-feeling _perverts_"— shove— "and your goddamn _greedyhands,_"— shove—"Why can't you leave me the _fuck_"— shove— "alone, HUH?"

Gojyo squirmed but was afraid to do anything else, lest Sanzo lose patience and shoot. His finger already looked pretty close to doing it. But with each shove, he found his cock really liked this kind of attention. And, it was true that he deserved it. Why couldn't he have kept his hands to himself? He closed his eyes, fingers scraping over the wood floor in an effort to get a handhold.

Then Sanzo ground his heel into the base of Gojyo's rather impressive hard-on and Gojyo reacted visibly. He thrust his hips against the pressure, gasping, "San-!" He moaned when Sanzo didn't stop. It hurt, but it felt so good, too. He sobbed at the treatment. "Sanzo! Please, Sanzo..."

Sanzo's face screwed up. It seemed he didn't like Gojyo's begging. The ruthless foot lifted, and Gojyo opened his eyes, breathing hard. Before he could do or say anything in reaction, Sanzo was sitting on him. Not hovering over, but SITTING, directly onto Gojyo's cock. However happy Gojyo's cock was at this turn of events, now he was facing a very close and very angry-looking monk.

That monk shouted, "Please what? You want to fuck me? Cum all over me? Huh? What do you want, you selfish bastard? Wasn't enough to get _me _off was it? How many times do I have to tell you perverts 'NO'? NO, do you hear me?" He pressed the gun against Gojyo's head and gripped Gojyo's collarbone hard enough to bruise, hate-filled glare aimed directly into Gojyo's eyes. Suddenly Gojyo realized that more than angry, Sanzo seemed kinda dazed or lost or something. He found himself reflexively wincing in shame.

"Hey, man, I'm sorry. Ok? Ya don't know how much."

Sanzo blinked. His hand relaxed, leaving white crescent marks from his fingernails in Gojyo's skin. He sat back, breathing hard from heightened emotion. He pinched the bridge of his nose and sat like that for awhile. Eventually, Gojyo built up enough confidence to whisper, "Sanzo, if you want to shoot me... Maybe you should. Like you said, I was being selfish... and I'm a pervert..."

"Idiot," Sanzo hissed, body yanking upright. To Gojyo's great relief, Sanzo clumsily got to his feet and stumbled over to his bed. Gojyo breathed a rather audible sigh of relief. He rolled over, wincing as his trapped, relentless hard-on was squeezed by his pants, and got to his feet. He padded silently behind Sanzo, who was leaning on the bed and breathing hard, eyes closed.

"Sanzo?" He questioned.

"Stay back, kappa. Better yet, get out of my room," he said, sounding aggravated.

"_Your_ room? It's mine too!" Gojyo said indignantly.

"Not anymore it's not. Go find your own place to sleep tonight."

"Aw c'mon, Sanzo! It's like 4 am!"

"Alright then, how would you like me to shoot you? Would that be better?" The barrel of the gun now rested menacingly on his nose; Gojyo had to admire Sanzo's aim even when wasn't looking his way.

"Whoa, okay, I'm outta here." He walked away from Sanzo and got his shoes. Then he grabbed his shirt and smokes and walked toward the door.

Sanzo still hadn't moved.

Gojyo paused at the door and stared at Sanzo. The moonlight made the room look a little dreary, matching the expression on Sanzo's face very well. Guilt bubbled up hot and acidic in his chest, and he sighed. He dropped all his stuff on the floor and walked over to Sanzo. Sanzo jerked, glaring at him and about to step back, when Gojyo's arms wrapped around him and immobilized him.

"Sanzo, I'm sorry," Gojyo whispered in his ear.

"Let go! Do you want to die?"

"Please, listen to me. I didn't mean... I thought, if you were asleep, it couldn't hurt, ya know? I didn't want you to wake up and get mad at me..."

"How is THAT better?"

"It's just—I never meant to hurt you."

"Get the fuck off of me. Don't make me shoot you."

"No, I mean… Rrgh!" Gojyo finished, frustrated. He wasn't good with words. He decided to speak with his body. His head darted forward and caught Sanzo's lips unaware. Sanzo tensed considerably and made an angry noise in his throat. Gojyo kept a rigid hold on the man, making sure to keep his arms pinned. He had the advantage of strength, after all. He kissed him delicately, like he was a soft flower. It was a move he used on virgins, admittedly, but it seemed to match how he truly felt about Sanzo.

He found Sanzo's lips were really warm and soft. He couldn't help the moan that rumbled in his throat when he realized who he was kissing, whose mouth he was enjoying so much. Oh yeah, this was worth everything he'd gone through tonight.

Then his mind stopped in its tracks and died. Sanzo pressed back, and even opened his mouth slightly. Gojyo moaned and couldn't help teasing the opening with his tongue. Sanzo shivered in his arms, and Gojyo took the cue. He only prodded lightly, tasting what he could. So what if he probably tasted like Sanzo's cum while kissing him? Sanzo tasted like Malboros and the tea he always drank. Gojyo knew he always would, but actually tasting it in Sanzo's mouth was a completely different experience than imagining it.

Finally he withdrew, and opened his eyes slightly. Sanzo's face was the most wanton thing Gojyo thought he'd ever seen, and something he thought he'd never see. The monk's eyes were at half-mast, his cheeks pink even in the moonlight, and his lips were swollen and wet. He looked even cuter than after his orgasm. All Gojyo wanted to do was kiss him again, but he thought he'd already lost his chance. He slowly let go, and Sanzo stumbled back a step. His free hands automatically brought up fingertips, which felt at his lips, and his gun, aimed at Gojyo.

He was panting as he finally looked up at Gojyo. Once their eyes met, Gojyo sincerely said, "I'm sorry about tonight Sanzo. It won't happen again."

He turned away and walked back to his stuff. Once he scooped it up he looked back at Sanzo. Sanzo was still holding the gun, but he looked too ill at ease to actually use it. Gojyo had no idea what the priest would be thinking right now, or how he'd handle this. He turned to leave as Sanzo had requested, when he was halted by a shocked voice.

"What—was that?" Sanzo said, demanding an answer. Gojyo looked at him, hand on the knob, and shrugged. "It was a kiss."

"WHY?" Sanzo said forcefully, almost shouting.

Gojyo cringed back against the door. Knowing Sanzo, he was really close to shooting him. TOO close. He very carefully said, "Because I wanted to."

Sanzo did not know how to react to this. On the one hand he was angry at a pervert taking advantage over him in any way, but he was also kind of flattered. Kissing was different than feeling up his ass or shooting lewd grins at him. And somehow Gojyo had told him something with that kiss, but he had no idea what it could be. He must be imagining things… Gojyo was just a pervert!

"Tch," Sanzo finally said, dropping his arm and turning to his bed.

Gojyo sighed in relief and turned the doorknob. As he was getting his body ready to move out the door, he was halted yet again by Sanzo. "Where do you think you're going?"

Gojyo, exasperated, turned around and said, "You said to leave!"

"Whatever. I paid for two beds, and your lazy ass better be asleep in it in five minutes or I really will kick you out."

Gojyo shut the door and quietly walked to the bed. It was rare for Sanzo to admit he was wrong in anything, and he never came right out and said it. That was as close to an apology as he'd ever heard Sanzo get. He took it graciously and was soon settled in bed, facing the wall. He laid there with his thoughts as he couldn't stop thinking about the man on the other bed behind him. His aching hardon wouldn't go away, but he was too afraid of masturbating. Eventually he opted for sneaking away to the bathroom.

After he was finally settled back in bed, he fell asleep with the thought, 'I hope I'm still alive in the morning.'

* * *

Chapter 2: Chapter 2

I'm so glad people have liked it so far! Here's the next part. I don't really have a goal in mind with the story except to get them to have sex and to remain in-character while doing so… Let me know how well I do XD The awesome thing about fanfiction and any other story that isn't published is that it can be edited :) Also, I self-beta my work so if you catch errors, feel free to let me know.

When he woke up he took a few minutes to languish, half in the realm of dreams and half out, before turning over and looking around the room. Sanzo was sitting on his bed, looking out the window. Outside the window it was pouring rain. Hard. Gojyo could hear it pounding the roof and mud outside. It was extremely overcast and Gojyo felt a little off-kilter, unable to tell what time of day it was.

He was about to ask, but that was before he looked at Sanzo again. When he did he found his jaw snapping shut. Sanzo seemed stoic, but something about the air around him was sad. Gojyo watched him silently a moment. Sanzo often got melancholy when it rained. Today he looked lost in thought, too.

Instead of saying something, he thought he'd alert Sanzo to the fact he was awake by stretching and then sitting up. He blinked sleepily at Sanzo, who had cast him a quick glance but nothing more. "Sup, Sanzo?" Gojyo said nonchalantly.

"It's raining too hard for Jeep to drive, because of the mud, so we're staying another day here."

Well, that wasn't what he'd meant. But ok. "Oh, cool," he replied. "Maybe I'll go back to sleep, then."

"Haven't you had enough sleep? You've been sleeping all day already."

Surprised, Gojyo ran his hand through his tangled hair. "Uh, didn't know. What time is it?"

"Late afternoon. You missed breakfast and lunch."

Pondering this, Gojyo asked, "Why didn't you wake me?"

"It would have been too much of a pain to wake you. It's your fault for missing mealtime," Sanzo grumbled.

Gojyo, despite Sanzo's tone, just grinned. He knew the monk well enough by now that he could tell there was another reason, one that Sanzo didn't want to admit. He would like to have assumed it was because Sanzo wanted to let him sleep because he got to bed late, but it was way more likely he didn't want to have to deal with Gojyo after last night. The memory of it made him wince and smile wider at the same time. Though if that was the case, why was Sanzo still here?

Gojyo swung his long legs over the side of the bed and stretched again. Afterwards he scratched his stomach contentedly and watched Sanzo a moment. He thought it best not to mention last night. Instead he said, "Hey Sanzo. Can I borrow the gold card so I can grab a snack to hold me over til dinner?"

Sanzo glared at him. "Like I'd trust you with the gold card. Besides, Hakkai has it. He's buying supplies and doing laundry."

"Oh. Maybe I've got some cash." He stood and searched around in his pockets and pulled out some change. He shrugged as he looked at it. "It'll have to do. You coming, Sanzo?"

Sanzo had already turned away. His next words were spoken into the glass. "Can't you handle buying something by yourself?"

"Eh? Just thought I'd ask. My treat."

Sanzo glared at Gojyo's reflection in the window but didn't turn around. "Screw you. Go get your damn food, kappa, and leave me in peace."

"Sheesh, okay, man," Gojyo said, shrugging his shoulders and rolling his eyes. So much for trying to make it up to Sanzo. As he stepped out of the room he flashed a concerned look over his shoulder, then shut the door. Sanzo closed his eyes and sighed.

That night, Gojyo made his way back to the room at a rather early time of the night. He was sort of proud of himself. He hadn't gotten into trouble all day, had even helped Hakkai with some of the various chores, and played cards with Goku for a little while. He'd gotten a rather rare full day of sleep, but he thought it would be best he didn't wake up Sanzo coming back late. The brief thought that he was actually going back early thinking he might score crossed his mind, but he shoved it down immediately. Nothing good would come of thinking of Sanzo like that. He felt that same acidic guilt corroding his throat, and he swallowed hard. Sanzo didn't appreciate it. Sanzo hated it. He wasn't going to do anything to hurt the poor bastard, especially since the poor bastard had a gun. Which, coincidentally, he wasn't afraid to use.

He hesitated outside the door. That's right, Sanzo had a gun. What if he thought that Gojyo was getting here early for the very reason he'd just thought of? What if he was pissed about it?

"Either get in here or go away, kappa," came a tired voice from within. Gojyo jumped. He opened the door and shuffled part of his body inside, trying to see where Sanzo and his gun were. The gun was on the bed beside him, but he wasn't holding it. It looked like he'd been cleaning it. He was currently in the almost exact same position he'd been in when Gojyo had left this afternoon: sitting on the bed, staring out the window.

"Uh, just checking to see if you were sleepin'," he said, feeling the lame excuse turn sour in his mouth.

"It's too early to be sleeping," Sanzo said, throwing a pointed look over his shoulder.

"Uh, I guess that's true, actually..." Gojyo trailed off as he came inside the room the rest of the way and shut the door behind him. To deflect the awkwardness between them, he quipped "Gloomy much?" and flicked on the light. When Sanzo just turned back to watching the light drizzle float past the dreary window, Gojyo felt brave enough to walk to his bed.

"I've thought about it, and I've decided that as long as there is no repeat performance of last night, I'll allow you to stay on the team. But only because I know how bent out of shape Hakkai and Goku get when you're gone," Sanzo declared at the window.

This startled Gojyo so much he almost fell instead of sat on the bed. "Is that right?" he said, his anger flaring. When Sanzo didn't move and he felt the guilt crawling back, his anger dissipated. "Sorry, man," he mumbled, then more strongly, "There won't be. You can count on that."

Immediately he knew something was wrong. Sanzo's proverbial hackles rose and he turned to face Gojyo. A strong glare fixed on the kappa, he growled, "And what is that supposed to mean?" Gojyo's face changed to one of confusion. "Wha?" he said.

"What was that supposed to mean?" Sanzo repeated.

Gojyo couldn't help but raise his own hackles in response. "Exactly what it means. The only reason I did that shit last night was because I was drunk."

Sanzo fixed him with an unreadable look, which was somehow worse than the glare. "Oh, really?"

"Yeah!" He didn't feel as confident as his voice sounded.

"Well then, there's nothing to worry about."

"Right!" Gojyo said, glowering. Sanzo snorted and turned back to the window.

"So, you can stop pouting about it, unholy-shit priest. Not everybody thinks you're the gods-gift-to-mankind."

Sanzo didn't move, or say anything for a moment. Gojyo was angry and he didn't really know why—he was the one who caused this mess in the first place—but he couldn't help it. He knew it would do no good in provoking Sanzo, but he couldn't help that either.

After a moment of awkward silence Sanzo quietly said, "I know."

Silence, but for the water running down the drain outside, descended on the room. Gojyo was puzzled by those words. For a few minutes Gojyo sat on the bed, staring at the floor and flicking his eyes at Sanzo, pondering. What the hell was that supposed to mean? Was Sanzo just fucking with his mind or what? Everybody knew what a lovely fuckin' piece of ass Sanzo was, even if he was just as bitchy as he was pretty. So what the HELL was that supposed to mean?

Finally fed up thinking about it, he uttered, "What the hell does that mean?"

Sanzo almost jumped, like he would've if he'd just been startled awake. He looked at Gojyo and squinted his eyes. "What?"

"What you said, 'I know'. What the hell do you mean by that?"

"Exactly what it means," Sanzo mocked.

"That tells me nothing."

"..."

Exasperated, Gojyo said, "Hey man, we all know you're a hot piece of ass. I just want to know if you're fucking around with me, or not. Don't just give me that 'I know' shit, like it's true."

Sanzo stared at him. He really wished there was something to hide behind; Sanzo's stare was so intense. Then he realized with shock what'd he'd just said, cursing himself silently inside his head, but on the outside playing it cool. But then he lost the staring contest as his eyes darted to the door. Maybe he'd be better off picking up a chick and screwing her all night long instead of talking with this asshole. That plan was sounding pretty good right about now.

"Did you just call me a hot piece of ass?" Sanzo said, sounding incredulous and maybe even angry.

"Uh," Gojyo said, gulping. He had no idea how to answer that one. By the way Sanzo reacted to Gojyo denying how attracted to him he was, it would be bad to say "no", but it was dangerous saying "yes" in case Sanzo got mad at that, too. 'Uh' was the best answer he could come up with. He kept his eyes on the floor.

"You did," Sanzo said, glowering at him.

"No, uh, I said... 'we', ya know…?" Gojyo sputtered, finally glancing up at the monk.

"We being, who, exactly?"

"The fuck does that matter!" Gojyo growled. His anger was returning. He couldn't keep his eyes on any one place; they just kept moving around nervously.

"It does, because if you're hitting on me, I'll have to kill you."

Gojyo's automatic defense mechanism, in place since he was a punk, came on at the insinuation he was gay. "I was NOT hitting on you!" Gojyo shouted, voice rising in pitch at the end.

Sanzo picked up his polished gun and slipped off the bed. He was on Gojyo in a flash. Gun pressed against his head with Sanzo's form leaning over him, Gojyo cowered back and stared at him wide-eyed. He hoped to god it wasn't loaded. How did he always manage to get into this type of mess?

"Make up your mind. Do you want me, yes or no?"

"What?"

"Was what happened last night real? Or is the reality what you're saying? Tell the truth, or so help me god I'll shoot you."

"Fuck, uh-!" Gojyo gulped at the sound of the trigger being pulled back. "I don't know what you want me to say! Just tell me what to say, and I'll say it."

"Just answer the FUCKING question, Gojyo!" Sanzo shouted down at him.

Gojyo showed his palms in a surrender gesture. "Okay! I think you're hot! I've thought that since the first time we met! Happy now?"

Sanzo, chest heaving, just stared down at him for a moment. Gojyo was sweating with worry. He couldn't believe what he'd just said. Then he felt Sanzo's free hand reach up into his hair and grip it tight. Gojyo clenched his teeth as Sanzo pulled his head back. And then Sanzo's breath was on his face, and Gojyo thought he might die of a heartattack.

_Surely I'm dreaming_, he thought as Sanzo's lips touched his own. Gojyo found himself pursing his lips, pressing firmly back. Sanzo withdrew after a moment. Gojyo blinked stupidly up at the beautiful face so close to his own. That kiss had been too goddamn short. Sanzo was staring at him with a blank expression. Gojyo wasn't sure what to do. Even so, he found himself defying the grip in his hair and straining up, pressing his mouth to those pouty pink lips above him. Sanzo hummed and pressed back.

Gojyo gave it everything he had. He thought he was going to die after this. There was no way this was real. He was probably already dead and just didn't know it yet. But still, he felt it. Felt it when Sanzo pressed soft kisses to his lips, felt it when he kissed back over and over. Felt it when Sanzo opened his mouth to his probing tongue; he could _taste_ Sanzo. Felt every contour of Sanzo's tongue pressing back. Felt his moan vibrating in his throat, felt Sanzo's insistent fist in his hair. He even felt the cold steel pressed against the back of his head.

Finally they broke away so they could breathe. As they panted Gojyo felt his body wilting and he flopped back onto the bed. Sanzo followed awkwardly, unwilling to let go. The gun he rested on the bed, however. With Sanzo positioned on top of Gojyo, Gojyo found his body most definitely responding. Not just the fact that the kiss they just shared was probably one of the hottest he'd ever been a participant of. But Sanzo was panting above him, robes bunched around his waist and his body's heat soaking into Gojyo's clothes and skin.

Before he thought better of it, Gojyo felt Sanzo's face with his fingertips, trying to see if he was really real. Yup, pretty real. He looked much like he had last night, but this time he'd intitated the kiss. Gojyo wasn't sure what to think; in fact, he'd stopped thinking a few minutes ago.

Sanzo broke him out of his reverie. "You're a fucking piece of shit, kappa," Sanzo muttered, jerking back so that Gojyo's fingers stopped touching him.

Gojyo quickly put his hand on the bed instead and sighed in exasperation. "Yeah, I know," he said, with obvious sarcasm. He didn't expect Sanzo to turn into a woman or a romantic with just a kiss. It was actually more comfortable like this, taking Sanzo's familiar abuse, when he knew damn well what Sanzo really thought of him, now. That kiss was not something you gave to an enemy or someone you hated. In fact, it was quite the opposite. The fact that Sanzo couldn't just admit it made his stomach knot with uncomfortable pleasure.

There was silence but for the pitter-patter of the rain on the roof and the tinkle of water going down the gutters. Gojyo took the time to breathe and wonder what Sanzo was thinking about. The goddamn monk had to feel his erection with the way he was positioned. He was kind of leaning right on it and it was getting to be uncomfortable.

Sanzo then leaned down over Gojyo until they were intimately close and he was propped up on one elbow. His right hand stroked quickly down Gojyo's body. The sound of cloth rasping was loud in the room. It stopped between them, where it then unceremoniously gripped Gojyo's hardon. Gojyo didn't know what to expect during all this, but that had definitely not been it. He took a deep shuddering breath, feeling himself get even harder at how close Sanzo was and what he was _doing_. Sanzo began to stroke him through his jeans, obviously not caring how they chafed. "San-!" Gojyo exclaimed and gripped the elbow of the hand that was moving.

"You're so hard, just from a kiss," Sanzo accused.

"Can't help it; you're so damn sexy," Gojyo whispered back. He arched up for a kiss but Sanzo drew back just enough to thwart him.

"I don't think so; I think you're thinking dirty thoughts about me," Sanzo said, voice grating but breathy.

Gojyo's mind reeled. He was used to dealing with women, who dealt in intrigue and innuendo rather than come right out with what they want, or think. Sanzo was kind of like that in a way. He had a unique way of dodging around the issue, but getting his point across anyway. It was more direct than Hakkai, but kind of more infuriating. Then Gojyo hit on an idea.

"No way," he said, matching Sanzo's breathiness. "Not when you're right in front of me."

Sanzo snorted. "Is that how you seduce women, Gojyo? By lying?"

Gojyo just grinned. For some reason he loved fighting with Sanzo, and he could totally tell by Sanzo's tone that he was actually pleased by what Gojyo had said. "No, no lying. You shouldn't be lying either. You like me too, don't you?"

Sanzo pushed himself up, but never let go of Gojyo's crotch. "Maybe we're both lying. In that case, let's see how far this lie can go."

"What—?" Gojyo started, but immediately quieted when he felt the button of his jeans being forced open. The hiss of his zipper that followed was really, really loud in the room. He started breathing harder, heart racing. Did Sanzo mean it? How far was "how far"? The possibilities were endless, and made Gojyo sweat. Did Sanzo have any idea?

He didn't resist when Sanzo tugged his jeans down; in fact, he helped, until they fell down to his ankles. Before he could try to kick them off—not something he usually could do without his hands, since he had big feet—Sanzo was already palming his erection. He couldn't escape the little "ah" sound he made at the skin-to-skin contact. Sanzo's hand felt really good. He could feel the slightly cool metal ring on Sanzo's finger, and that only helped make him harder. He really wished he could see Sanzo in his tight shirt, too. Sanzo's attire was practically a fetish for him now.

"Yeah, Sanzo," Gojyo gasped. "Unh…"

Gojyo could feel the precum leaking from the tip of his cock get accidentally swiped up in Sanzo's hand, on the glove even, and he got even harder, if one could believe it. The realization that_Sanzo_ was pumping his callused hand over his engorged cock made Gojyo moan again. As good as it was, he wanted more. He looked up at Sanzo's face. Even though it was angled away from the light, he could still make out the features, though his purple eyes appeared black. They were watching him intently, Sanzo's mouth parted just barely. And Sanzo was blushing. Gojyo panted hard and thrust his hips.

"Sanzo," he groaned. "Sanzo, I want you so much… Ah!" Just then, Sanzo's hand squeezed.

"Oh really?" Sanzo said, his tone cold, and opposite from what could be expected in this situation.

Gojyo groaned as his eyes slid shut. "Why don't you believe me?" he aggrieved.

"Hn."

Gojyo sat up, pressing him body lightly against Sanzo's chest, and gripped Sanzo's wrists. Sanzo stiffened, unsure what Gojyo was doing. "You don't have to do that, ok? Let me do you," Gojyo whispered into his ear. Sanzo's response was to grumble something unintelligible back, but release him. Gojyo steered Sanzo to sit on the bed, then slid his hands amongst Sanzo's robes until he found the top of his jeans. Trying to be as sexy and erotic as possible, he slowly rubbed the bulge he found. Sanzo flinched, eyebrows drawing together momentarily. He was already panting with need, eyes a little out of focus. He was staring somewhere at Gojyo's shoulder.

Gojyo leaned forward and pressed his lips lightly against Sanzo's as he suddenly, and rather forcefully, yanked open the button and zipper of Sanzo's jeans in one smooth motion. He snaked his tongue into Sanzo's panting mouth and swallowed Sanzo's desperate moan. That moan sent electric sparks shooting down Gojyo's back. He moaned in response and pressed his lips firmly. Sanzo's hand gripped the back of his head, running his fingers through his hair. The other one went to hold his bunched robes out of the way as Gojyo ran his fingertips over Sanzo's already wet erection.

"MM!" Sanzo exclaimed in Gojyo's mouth at the contact. His chest was heaving, his body trembling against Gojyo.

Gojyo eased his tongue out, then kissed his lips to Sanzo's open mouth once, then withdrew the rest of the way. "Yeah, Sanzo," he groaned. "God, you're sensitive."

"Sh-shut up…" Sanzo whispered. His breath was husky and soft. Gojyo felt his body flush with lust.

"I want you, Sanzo," Gojyo whispered back, feeling a smile grace his face. "Let me show you how much."

"P-pervert," Sanzo gritted. Gojyo only licked at his teeth and hummed.

"Scoot back," Gojyo ordered softly. Fixing him with a warning look—which Gojyo deftly ignored—Sanzo complied until he was securely in the middle of the bed. Gojyo pushed at his shoulders gently until the monk relaxed and allowed himself to be pressed to the bed. Gojyo quickly drew his shirt over his head and stomped at his jeans until they finally came off. He kicked them away and now stood fully naked in front of the bed and Sanzo, who was laying back with his legs to both sides.

Gojyo paused, dumbfounded by the sight: Sanzo was shuttering his eyes at the image of a glowing Gojyo standing naked in front of the light. His face was flushed, his chest heaving. He was fully dressed but for the fact his robes were bunched up around his hips, his jeans were open, and the red, weeping hardon he sported was showing amidst the layers of fabric. Gojyo found himself overcome by the sight. It was better than any wetdream he'd ever had about the priest, and better than any daydream by far. Sanzo was gripping his robes in tight fists and panting harder as Gojyo stared at him.

"What are you waiting for?" he finally ground out, showing how desperate and aggravated he was by his tone.

That seemed to snap Gojyo out of it. He muttered an apology, then louder said, "You're so… God damn, you're so beautiful…" He ran his hands up Sanzo's thighs, making Sanzo shiver and close his eyes, thinking he was going to get the touch he so avidly craved. "Is it okay if I… you know, take your clothes off?" Gojyo said huskily, trying not to sound as fumbling and stupid as he felt compared to this beautiful and now suddenly erotic man.

"Do what you want," Sanzo said, punctuating his words with a thrust of his hips. _…as long as you hurry up,_ Gojyo added in his mind, which made him smirk.

Gojyo went straight for the robes first, fussing with the sash and pulling it open. Sanzo reluctantly let go of it as Gojyo's hands reached his, transferring his death grip to Gojyo's upper arms. Once it was off to the sides, though still pinned beneath Sanzo's body, Gojyo ran his hands up underneath Sanzo's shirt. He loved the feel of the soft skin over firm muscles. He remembered the first time he did this, last night, and it was still amazing. However, this time, Sanzo was awake and watching him. With that thought Gojyo dipped forward and kissed Sanzo's pale abdomen. He smiled as it shuddered beneath him. Then he kissed and licked his way up, slowly trailing after his hands pushing steadily upwards, leaving lovebites as he went. When he reached Sanzo's collarbone he turned his attention to Sanzo's nipples. He licked one slowly while rubbing the other with his thumb and enjoyed the feeling of them getting hard under the attention. He then bit gently and squeezed the other, causing Sanzo to cry out. The monk's breathing was getting really ragged.

Gojyo pushed himself up with an arm on the bed and helped Sanzo tug the shirt over his head. Wordlessly, then, Sanzo began to roll his gloves off. As he did that, Gojyo turned his attention to his pants. He tugged them down gently but with enough force to get them off. When he returned to his spot between Sanzo's legs up against the bed, Sanzo was fully naked. _Holy shit, holy shit, holy shitshitshitshit_, Gojyo thought in his head as the hanyou looked at him. He'd propped himself up onto his elbows while Gojyo was busy, and was now quite obviously feasting on the sight of Gojyo's body. He was really hard and Gojyo had to take a moment to admire the shape and size of his cock. It was like everything else Sanzo—perfect, stiff, and just really fucking beautiful to look at, but was latently dangerous, too. He'd never put something that big into, you know, 'down there', so he hoped that Sanzo didn't want to top. _Really_ hoped.

Sanzo reached out then and clutched Gojyo around the middle. Squeezing Gojyo's lower back lightly, he pulled Gojyo down more gently than Gojyo had expected. Even though Gojyo had tensed up, he allowed Sanzo to pull him forward. "C'mere, kappa," Sanzo whispered. Gojyo hummed back and kissed him. They descended slowly to the bed and Gojyo started caressing Sanzo. Sanzo, for his part, went straight for Gojyo's cock. Gojyo moaned sharply at the rough contact. And then he felt his balls tighten like he was going to come as he felt Sanzo's gun-callused hands smearing his precum all up and down his length.

Gojyo broke from the kiss and mumbled into his mouth. "Oh yeah." He kissed down Sanzo's neck, moaning "oh shit" and "Sanzo". Sanzo made a little noise when Gojyo thrust into his grip. "God, I could come just from you doing that, baby," Gojyo crooned.

"Don't call me baby," Sanzo said gruffly and did a particularly vicious yank. Gojyo jerked with a grunt, then chuckled. "Rraowr," Gojyo teased and nipped Sanzo's neck. Gojyo's hands were now drawing nonsense into Sanzo's thighs and Sanzo couldn't take it anymore.

He let go of Gojyo and shoved him. Gojyo didn't let him shove him far. But before Gojyo could ask or say a word, Sanzo shouted, "I'm not a woman, Gojyo, and I need…" Here he paused, as if confused, and just disjointedly finished, "_now_… God dammit!"

_Okay, so he might be erotic right now, but he's still Sanzo_, Gojyo thought.

"I gotcha, sweetie," Gojyo said, smiling. He settled his groin to Sanzo's and grabbed himself and Sanzo in one hand. Sanzo stopped glaring when he saw what he was doing, but he looked puzzled. "What are you doing, you idiot?" Sanzo growled. Obviously that's not what he'd been attempting to allude to. Gojyo just winked and said, "Don't worry, Cherry-chan, you're gonna like this!"

It was hard to get a enough of a grip around both hard erections, but Gojyo managed it enough. He massaged them as he pistoned his hips forward. "Oh shit," Gojyo said at the same time as Sanzo grunted in surprise and pleasure. _That was good_, he thought, and by the look on Sanzo's face he was thinking the same thing. He did it again, and if one could believe it, it felt even better! He began to slowly fuck/jack both of them off at the same time. By the grip Sanzo now had on his hips he was doing a good job. Gojyo held himself up with one hand and looked down at Sanzo, at his eyes. Sanzo wasn't looking at him, though, but instead at their rubbing cocks.

Then his face screwed up and he threw his head back with an, "Ah!" Gojyo had shifted his hand to wrap around both of their heads in a vice-like grip and continued to thrust into that. Gojyo could tell he was close; he was close himself. Gojyo leaned closer to him, wanting to feel him up close, even if it was harder to keep his hold. He kissed Sanzo's bared throat. Sanzo turned his face away and began thrusting his body up with his motions. His grip on Gojyo's hips got tighter until his nails were digging into Gojyo's flesh. Gojyo didn't even feel it, he was so intent on his pleasure.

"Fuck, I'm gonna come, Sanzo," he whispered in Sanzo's ear.

"Hmm," Sanzo moaned, tight-lipped. "Mm!"

"Unh, come with me," Gojyo demanded, hot and heavy. He increased the pace. "Come with me, Sanzo!"

That sent Sanzo over the edge. He gasped loudly and went still, groin roughly shoved up against Gojyo's cock, pressing both cocks flush between their bodies. Gojyo felt him spurt, coating his grip and both of their chests, and followed a second later. As Sanzo relaxed, he kept rotating his hips, riding out his orgasm, and Sanzo began to moan delicately as the pleasure continued. Addicted to that sound, Gojyo continued until he couldn't anymore and collapsed on top of Sanzo's sweaty and sticky chest, hand still trapped between them.

He took a moment to breathe, feeling like he was coming back from being underwater. The first thing he noticed was Sanzo's harsh breathing against his own expanding and contracting chest. He could feel Sanzo's heartbeat and for the second time in the last 24 hours he was amazed by the fact that Sanzo had a heart after all. He smiled at the recurring thought and pushed himself up as if he had all the time in the world to do so. "That was good," he groaned as he tried to figure out the best way to get comfortable with the least effort possible.

"Hm," Sanzo responded, sounding pretty content with that assertion, himself.

Gojyo decided to just awkwardly flop to the side and roll quickly off Sanzo's leg. For Sanzo's part, he didn't care; he was much too winded. He hadn't moved since his muscles went slack with his post-orgasm. Gojyo looked over and saw his eyes were closed against the light, pale body still flushed. He looked like he'd fall asleep, even if his legs were over the side of the bed.

After a minute of this, once he felt like he'd recovered enough, Gojyo got up. He put one knee on the bed and picked Sanzo up with both arms, one under the monk's legs, one under his back. Sanzo's eyes snapped open to glare at Gojyo, but Gojyo just smiled back. He turned his body 90 degrees and lay Sanzo the correct way on the bed. The blonde stretched out once there, back arching and legs stretching out, as he yawned, of all things.

Gojyo got on the few inches left over and lay on his side beside Sanzo. Sanzo looked at him after his sleepy little display, and frowned at Gojyo's look. "Pervert," Sanzo accused.

"Yup," Gojyo said congenially. Gojyo couldn't help it then, he kissed him, much like the first night. It wasn't a sexy kiss; it was what Gojyo referred to as a "Hello, Beautiful" type of kiss. Sanzo seemed to have other ideas. When Gojyo meant to back away, Sanzo turned his body toward Gojyo and grabbed the back of his head. He pressed his lips forcefully to the other man's and asked for entry with his tongue. It sounded good to Gojyo; he opened up, and reciprocated with his own tongue. They battled with their mouths, Gojyo following Sanzo's lead. Sanzo upped the ante by stroking his hand down Gojyo's well-formed chest, digging in with his fingers in all the right places. Gojyo moaned and stroked Sanzo's back, massaging as he did so. It was Sanzo's turn to moan.

It seemed that Sanzo wasn't planning on sleeping now. Instead, he seemed ready for another go.

Review please! Even if it's just to say how you much you like the story so far and/or how awesome I am, it will encourage me to write more and maybe faster ;) Another part is coming up, furthering the smex and "plot" more. If you think Sanzo's being too submissive here, just wait for it!

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Chapter 3: Chapter 3

Their kiss had quickly turned into a fondle session. Gojyo wasn't complaining, but he was a little bit surprised. He'd expected Sanzo to push him away and fall asleep. Blood was rushing in his ears; could it be possible that Sanzo was willing to go all the way? He was getting stoked just thinking about it.

"You're doing it again, pervert," Sanzo grumbled against his lips, head tilted back and looking at Gojyo's face.

"Doing what?" Gojyo asked innocently.

Sanzo grunted, annoyed. He smoothed his hand over Gojyo's arousal. Gojyo moaned in approval and grabbed Sanzo's ass, kissing him again. He pushed up and positioned himself over Sanzo, all the while kissing the monk. He got between Sanzo's legs and smoothed his hands over his thighs.

Then Sanzo pushed him, hard enough to detach their lips and have Gojyo sitting upright, blinking in surprise. Sanzo was panting and a bit of red tinged his cheeks. His expression was not lustful, but angry. "What's up, Sanzo?" Gojyo asked, rubbing his thumbs over Sanzo's knees.

"Get out of there," Sanzo ordered, glaring.

"Where?" Gojyo asked, confused.

Sanzo thrashed his legs and pushed at Gojyo with his feet. "Did you think you were going to top me?" Sanzo asked hoarsely, still glaring.

Gojyo ran a hand through his hair and shrugged. "Uh, _yeah_? That is what Sha Gojyo does."

"Tch," was Sanzo's only reply. He turned and put his legs over the side of the bed. "I should have known you would have been this annoying."

"Oh c'mon, Sanzo. What were you expecting?"

Sanzo looked at him with his head tilted, his posture telling Gojyo he thought he was an idiot and an insect at the same time. Goddamn holier-than-thou monk. "Well you sucked me off so well last night I thought-"

"Whoa, whoa!" Gojyo interrupted. "You had a gun pointed at me!"

Sanzo sneered. "That didn't stop you from enjoying it."

"You are such a prick, you know that?" Gojyo said, folding his arms.

Sanzo's sneer faded into a little smile, barely perceptible. He was looking at Gojyo a little strangely, actually. He seemed to change his mind about something, and got back onto the bed, this time on all fours. He crawled over to Gojyo, making him back down until he was on top. Though, Gojyo was back between his legs, something of which he took special note of. "I can be nice when I want to be," Sanzo growled.

"You? Nice? No way," Gojyo said, gulping despite his words. That had been pretty hot.

Sanzo laughed in that deep, evil way of his. "Kuh kuh kuh." Gojyo was a little creeped out but he didn't really mind, seeing as how he was underneath a beauty. When Sanzo stopped laughing he leaned over to kiss Gojyo, immediately demanding entrance with his tongue. Gojyo granted it and they began wrestling with their mouths. Sanzo was extremely aggressive this time, as if he had to prove himself somehow. Gojyo was almost too afraid to challenge him back, but there was no way he was going to just take whatever Sanzo wanted lying down. Well, as long as the gun wasn't involved... Which it wasn't!

He rolled Sanzo over roughly. They almost fell out of the bed, so Sanzo compensated by lying flat and grabbing the bed. Gojyo took advantage of this distraction and grabbed Sanzo's ankle. Sanzo stiffened and his eyes went wide, but Gojyo persisted, using his grip to direct Sanzo's leg up in the air. He gently nudged at Sanzo's entrance, showing him what he wanted. Sanzo stiffened even more. Gojyo whispered encouragement and bent down for a kiss.

The next thing Sha Gojyo knew was he was on the floor. His lower back hurt like hell and he was sprawled, quite naked, beside the bed. He blinked at the ceiling and groaned in pain. It'd happened so fast. He sat up and looked toward the door. Sanzo was standing butt-naked with his hand on the knob. He was breathing hard. His back was turned to Gojyo, but he could see the obvious slump in his shoulders. Sanzo braced his hand on the wall beside the doorway and leaned forward until his forehead met the door with a dull thunk.

"Uh, where ya goin' so fast?" Gojyo asked. "Lookin' like that, no less." He kept his voice flippant, because in reality he was extremely pissed and confused but didn't want to show it.

"Don't," Sanzo hissed. "Don't ever touch me like that again."

Gojyo was silent. Sanzo was a ball of tension and he could feel the negativity of his emotions rolling off him in waves. What exactly had that been all about?

"You mean, touch your asshole? How else was I gonna prepare you?" Gojyo said, groaning as he got up from the floor.

"No," was all Sanzo said.

Wait a sec, did Gojyo just hear a hitch in Sanzo's breath? Was he choked up or just taciturn like usual? Nah, definitely choked up. Gojyo was shocked.

"Hey man, I understand if someone's never touched you there before, but that was uncalled for... Was I too rough or something?" _Tell me, you prick. What'd I do now?_

"No," Sanzo said again. It was hard to tell if he was answering the question or being Mr. Negativity to anything that was said.

Gojyo approached him. He put his hands on Sanzo's upper arms and rubbed in what he thought was a comforting way.

Sanzo shrugged the touch off his shoulders and pushed at Gojyo's chest without turning around. "Don't touch me," he said coldly.

"Aww, c'mon Sanzo! Stop being such a baby about this!" Gojyo shouted, exasperated. What the hell?

He grabbed his shoulders and squeezed reassuringly. "Tell me-"

Gojyo just barely dodged the elbow to his ribcage. The maneuver finally made Sanzo turn around partially and for a second their eyes met. Sanzo's eyes, that told everything, even when Sanzo didn't want to say a word. For that brief moment, Gojyo saw pain. Pure, unadulterated pain. There was even a tear on Sanzo's upper cheek.

Then it was gone, Sanzo's face turned back toward the door. He put his forehead back against the wood and hissed, "Shit," against it.

"Sanzo," Gojyo whispered, surprise and gentle concern apparent even to him.

"Just give me a _fucking_ moment, Gojyo," Sanzo growled. Tear or no tear, he still sounded like his usual dangerous self. Gojyo thought that hell must have frozen over or something, because now he didn't know WHAT was real anymore. Confused and feeling rejected, Gojyo made his way back to the bed and sat there silently.

Ten minutes must have passed like that, Gojyo fidgeting on the bed and Sanzo just standing there stiff as a board. Every once in awhile Gojyo thought he made out some strange words, and figured Sanzo was chanting a quiet mantra out loud to himself.

Then Sanzo slowly moved away from the door and headed back toward Gojyo. He didn't meet Gojyo's eyes, and the tear was gone. Alarmingly, Gojyo thought he looked _dead_. Like, too calm. He watched silently as Sanzo bent down and picked up all his clothes and brought them to his own bed. Gojyo watched him dress, unable to help but admire his body until it was covered up by his tight shirt and jeans. They barely made a difference. Gojyo's mouth was definitely watering. It looked like nothing further was gonna happen now, though.

He couldn't be surprised. This was Sanzo, after all. Probably what had happened last night and tonight would never happen again. _He probably won't talk to me for weeks_, Gojyo thought. The idea hurt. The idea stung his heart like a motherfucking bitch.

"Not a word," Sanzo growled at the air ,definitely not toward Gojyo, and he walked out of the room, slamming the door behind him. Gojyo sat, still naked, on the bed, completely confused and hurt. He knew he wasn't the one suffering here. But he had no idea what to do.

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Chapter 4: Chapter 4

I'm so happy whenever I see people add my story to favorites or alert, and I've been busy lately but I've been writing this since the last update. I just didn't have time to finish it. I should have been doing NaNoWriMo, but it's been too long. Thank you so much for your reviews etc!

Edit: Since I rushed this chapter I wanted to fix some things. All major changes are in bold. There are a lot of little changes that aren't, though. (December 3)

The next morning, Hakkai was downstairs with a sleepy-eyed Goku waiting for their food to arrive. Sanzo came and took a seat next to Hakkai, meeting the usual "good morning" with gruff silence. He quickly snatched up the paper Hakkai had left on the table for him and buried himself in it. The monk remained immobile as their tea and coffee arrived, and even ignored Goku's shouts as the food was put on the table. That was odd. He was in an even more sour mood than he'd been in yesterday, if that was possible.

Hakkai smiled at Goku's sudden rambunctiousness and diligently set into his food. The healer kept an eye on Sanzo with some concern. Finally, after a few minutes had passed, Sanzo put the paper down to grab some food. Hakkai tried not to stare but Sanzo didn't seem to notice, anyway. Even Goku was giving him looks, which were just as deftly ignored.

"Did you sleep well last night, Goku?" Hakkai asked to break the tension. He put another bite of omelet in his mouth as Goku cried, "Yeah! Wish I could sleep longer, though…"

"How about you, Sanzo?"

"Hmph."

"I'm afraid 'hmph' is not a word, Sanzo." He smiled to reduce the ferocity of the jab, but Sanzo didn't look up. "Is something bothering you?" Hakkai prodded gently.

"No," was all Sanzo said before he quickly bit into some toast. Hakkai didn't pry further; it wasn't the time. Sanzo didn't like to talk about things. Perhaps he'd had a nightmare…

Then Gojyo came clomping down the stairs. He sidled up to the table with his hands in his pockets, and plopped down in his seat without ever removing them. "Yo," he said nonchalantly and finally took his hand out to grab at something on Goku's plate.

"Hey, cockroach! Hands off my sausage!"

Gojyo chuckled, a leer plastered on his face, holding Goku away by the head as he popped it into his mouth. As an argument started, Hakkai ignored them and continued to watch Sanzo. When Gojyo had arrived, Sanzo had stiffened considerably and stopped with his fork midway to his mouth. After the argument started, he quickly put it down and turned just barely toward Hakkai—though not looking at him—_away_ from Gojyo. He rummaged in his robe for a moment, then got up from the table.

Usually when Sanzo walked, the only thing that could be heard was the flap of his sandals, and nowadays the creaking of his boots. He had a very light step, probably due to his martial arts training. However, this time, as he dashed for the door, his footsteps actually made sound, and upon hearing them Gojyo watched his retreating back for a moment. Then his eyes quickly flicked back to the table and he was stiff as he picked at his food.

"Is something the matter, Gojyo?" Hakkai asked quietly, hoping he wouldn't be heard by Goku over his loud chewing. Gojyo looked at him, and Hakkai felt like someone had just doused him with ice cold water. He swallowed harshly in response to that look and nodded silently. Gojyo gave a sad half-smile and went back to his food. Hakkai stood up and looked toward the door. "I'll be back in a moment," he said as he began to walk away.

As he was nearing the door he heard Goku say, "Why's Hakkai leavin'?"

He stepped outside and immediately spotted Sanzo not far away leaning against the wall of the inn, cigarette in hand. He was looking off into the distance and quietly accepted Hakkai's presence alongside him. After a moment of silence Hakkai asked, "What is going on, Sanzo? You seem to be angry at Gojyo about something."

"What makes you say that?" Sanzo feigned disinterest.

"Because of the way you reacted when he came to breakfast this morning. Coupled with your behavior yesterday, I say it's fairly certain something happened."

"Tch."

"Um…" Hakkai prodded. "I know how Gojyo can be. He didn't …do something, did he?"

"That kappa's always doing something."

This alarmed Hakkai greatly, and he showed it in the tone of his voice as he said, "What do you mean?"

"Fuck, Hakkai, do you really want to get yourself involved in this mess?" Sanzo muttered none-to-happily.

"What mess? Sanzo? What did Gojyo do?"

"Just leave it alone. Go tell them that we're leaving in 5 minutes."

"Sanzo…" Hakkai said, annoyed and dismayed at once. It seemed fairly obvious that Gojyo had done _something_. It was so hard to tell what that something could be when it came to Sanzo, though. He was always so vague. Plenty of things bothered him, too.

His mind whirred through various thoughts frantically as he walked back inside. It didn't seem likely it was a prank, since Sanzo would be angry but not avoidant. And it didn't seem likely that they had argued, since they would both be angry—which Gojyo wasn't. Could it be, dare he think it, something sexual? He'd always suspected Gojyo had something of a crush on Sanzo, as far as a straight guy could have a crush on another guy. It was kind of bizarre, but that was Gojyo for you. He tended to think more with his private parts than anything else.

And, that would explain the guilt written all over Gojyo's face.

He reached the table and sat down, smiling at the two dopey faces gawking at him. "We're leaving in five minutes."

They both groaned, and Goku began jamming various pieces of food down his throat. "Slow down or you'll choke," Hakkai admonished and smiled. He picked at his food and tried his best to have a decent conversation with Gojyo, but it was slow going. He didn't seem to want to talk. By the time their conversation was finally underway, Sanzo was standing at the door glaring at their table. Hakkai quickly ushered them to hurry and tried to put his mind to the task at hand, which was getting them safely to the next town.

A week later and it was no different. This was the second town in that amount of time, and the ikkou was running on fumes—both mentally and physically. Even Hakaryu had little energy to chirp when they arrived. As they sat at the dinner table, Hakkai pondered over the situation. Gojyo was being just as avoidant of Sanzo as Sanzo was of him. They took smoke breaks at different times, managed to sit at the table so that they weren't next to each other, and wouldn't join in on a conversation the other one was in. Hakkai was getting fed up of this behavior. Goku was as cheerful as ever, but he was given these days to sometimes stare back and forth between the two, obviously puzzled. Hakkai prayed that what he thought had happened hadn't.

Would Gojyo do such a thing? He didn't want to think that about his friend.

Agonized by these thoughts, he decided he had to do something about it. What was the best way to get these two to talk? Obviously if one reduced their inhibitions, they would willingly work it out themselves. He mulled over this plan during dinner, saying nothing the whole time, and as the waitress brought the receipt and card back he decided it was the best way.

"What would you gentlemen think of getting a few drinks at the bar?" he said, tilting his head and smiling. Gojyo perked up and quickly said, "Sure!" before Sanzo could even open his mouth. Sanzo pretended to ignore the kappa's involvement in this and spoke to Hakkai directly. "I'm tired. I'm going to bed."

"But Sanzo, as I recall, you are responsible for our money. Both myself and Gojyo would drink to the limit if you aren't there to supervise."

"I trust you to be responsible, Hakkai." He took the card still in his hand and held it out to him.

"No, Sanzo. I insist. You could use a few drinks, too." He put his hand in front of the card as if to stop it. Sanzo glared at him, holding the card steady in the air.

"Can I go too?" Goku piped up. Hakkai had to shake his head. "Remember the last time you did that? You just fell asleep... And you aren't of legal age," Hakkai made sure to add.

"Awww... I never get to have fun..."

There was a tense moment of silence as Sanzo and Hakkai had a nonverbal stand-off. Then Sanzo 'tched' and put the card away. He had apparently realized that Hakkai wasn't going to let this go. The healer was surprised he hadn't put up more of a fight, but perhaps he wanted to go drinking, too, Gojyo or no Gojyo. Hakkai stood and the rest of the group followed suit. When they exited Hakkai handed Hakaryu over to Goku and watched him run off toward the inn. He smiled at the two glum and stiff men with him and led the way to the bar he'd seen on the way into town. They found a table and ordered their drinks, beer for Gojyo and sake for Sanzo. Hakkai ordered some bourbon and got sour faces from his drinking buddies. He smiled cheerfully and raised his glass to them before taking the shot.

He coughed gently and licked his lips. Gojyo was sucking at his beer can like it was a magic potion, and Sanzo was staring at his now empty cup. Hakkai made conversation while he waited for the alcohol to start taking effect—for the others at least. He continued to have strong drinks, almost wishing they would work, but feeling nothing. His friends weren't fairing so well as the night wore on, however. Seasoned drinker as he was, Gojyo was drinking like a parched man, and Sanzo kept somberly taking shot after shot.

"Oi, 'Kai, don't you hate doshe cocktease women who fuckin'... shtart doin' it 'n den are only fakin' ya out in tha end?" Gojyo hiccuped.

Hakkai admired the alcohol-induced blush staining his face red. Unlike some men whose whole face got red, he just got a touch across his cheeks. He was obviously waiting for an answer, but out of the corner of his eye Hakkai could see Sanzo glaring at Gojyo. _That has to be the first time he's looked directly at him for more than a week_, Hakkai thought.

"I'm afraid I wouldn't have much experience with that, Gojyo..."

"Yeah well, I fuckin' hate cockteases."

"Fuck you," Sanzo spat. Gojyo dizzily looked at Sanzo, surprised at first, then he just glared back. "Well, a man'sh gotta right to know when tha girl he'sh messhin' wit' ain't into it. What would ya know, baldy?"

Sanzo was practically steaming now. "Well then, what kind of man touches someone there?"

"Oh yeah? Well what elshe was I shupposed to do, huh?"

"Pervert!" Sanzo growled.

"Uptight prick!"

"Now now, you two. We're in a public place..." Hakkai was feeling his own version of a blush spreading, not knowing what in the world they were talking about but unable to keep his mind from wandering.

"You don't even know what I'm...fucking... meaning..." Sanzo mumbled, blushing furiously. They didn't seem to notice Hakkai's comment.

"Oh yeah? Den w'at am I misshing? Huh? _You_ tell _me_," Gojyo shouted.

Sanzo shook his head. "Bastard," he growled. He was swaying in his seat. "I should kill you and be done with it."

"Yeah, that's right! You ain't got a 'scuse! You're jusht an asshole! I don't know why I even...talk to you! Prick..."

"Fuuuck," Sanzo groaned. He didn't seem to want to argue anymore. Hakkai noticed they were getting some looks. He got up without any acknowledgment by the other two and found the waitress and asked to pay the tab. By the time he returned they were arguing again.

"I get plenty of tail, asshole!" Gojyo was slurring. "It ain't my fault if you dun know how dese thingsh work!"

"_You don't_! Do I look like a woman to you?"

"A woman, huh? Matter fact, ya do! Have ya looked in tha mirror lately, oh holy piece of shit!"

"FUCK YOU! I'll fucking kill you!" He sprang up and flew at Gojyo, apparently unaware that he had a gun he could use more effectively. He slammed into Gojyo and made him fall partially out of the seat. They began punching each other and rolling around, knocking both the chair and table over.

Hakkai realized then that his plan had backfired. He'd hardly figured out anything at all, and now they were fighting. The employees were beginning to run around and they were being watched by everyone in the establishment. Some of the drunk men were beginning to cheer. There was a loud ripping sound and Hakkai saw a peek of Sanzo's black turtleneck through his robe. He groaned, dismayed at the thought that now he'd have to mend that, and gathered chi in his hands.

"Stop it, you two!" he shouted and when they didn't, sent his chi at them. It was a mild blast, only enough to cause a rather rude sensation. Gojyo jumped off of Sanzo and rubbed his arm where it had hit him. Sanzo was staring shocked at Hakkai as he sat up. He had an angry bruise on his cheek and a trail of blood down his chin from a cut in his lip. Gojyo looked like he'd have a black eye in the morning if it wasn't attended to. He'd have to inspect them in more detail later, but for now it was best they leave. The bouncers were looking at the pair unimpressed. "We're leaving," he quickly said and gathered both of them under the arm like naughty children and dragged them out of the door.

"Look, ya got us kicked out, baldy!"

Sanzo, seething, yanked his arm from Hakkai's and stomped ahead of them, grumbling curses and threats. "Gojyo, please," Hakkai pleaded.

Gojyo's attitude turned around 180 degrees as he grinned like a mischievous boy at him. "Sorry, 'Kai. We had an argument," he said, as if that explained everything. He seemed a bit more sober than he did a moment ago. At least he wasn't talking like a drunk man.

"Yes you did," Hakkai said complacently.

Up ahead Sanzo had stopped in the street, his posture stiff. When Hakkai and Gojyo approached, he turned and walked up to Gojyo. Gojyo barely stopped walking in time before he stomped on Sanzo's shoes. Hakkai was about to get between the two of them again, but what Sanzo said stopped _him_ in his tracks, too.

"You're the one who sucked me off like it was the best goddamn thing you've ever tasted, so how can you be surprised when I think I'm going to top you?"

Gojyo's face flushed and he cast a glance at a shocked-looking Hakkai. Before he could say anything, Sanzo shoved him and shouted, "Well?"

Gojyo glared at Sanzo. The street was empty at present, except for Hakkai, so he let the words come freely. "That wouldn't have happened if you hadn't put a gun to my head! And yeah I enjoyed suckin' ya off, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna let you stick it in me! You're the one who freaked out on me without an explanation!"

"I don't need to explain myself to you!"

"Goddammit Sanzo!" Gojyo shouted, pushing the target of his anger. Sanzo was caught off-guard—how drunk _was_ he?-and almost fell, but he grabbed one of Gojyo's wrists. He somehow still had his quick reflexes. But Gojyo wasn't exactly steady on his feet at the moment, either, and _somehow_ they stumbled and fell, Gojyo on top of Sanzo. Immediately Sanzo began fighting him off, though Hakkai had to wonder how aware he was of the fact he'd caused Gojyo to fall on him. Gojyo automatically began fighting back, too. As they rolled around, grunting and punching and scratching at each other, Hakkai took a moment to weigh his options.

Before he could decide what he should do to break up the fight this time, the fight seemed to resolve itself—somewhat. It was hard to tell who initiated it first, but Sanzo and Gojyo were soon_kissing_ each other. The struggling had died down with Sanzo on top, though one of his arms was pinned beneath Gojyo's back.

Hakkai felt his face flush yet again. This time it didn't stop there. The sight of his two companions french kissing on the ground made the flush spread to the rest of his body. He soon found his nether regions waking up, rather eagerly in fact. As mortified as he was of this, he was more mortified that he was watching his two friends kiss each other drunk—something he was responsible for. Apparently this wasn't the first time they had done this though... Hakkai's head was spinning. Perhaps it was all the blood rushing to his engorged member, but he felt distinctly dizzy and light-headed.

Then Gojyo was moaning into Sanzo's insistent mouth. Sanzo's free hand was inching its way up underneath Gojyo's wifebeater. Hakkai swallowed hard. Gojyo thrust his hips up into Sanzo's stomach and moaned again. The hanyou sat up and maneuvered Sanzo to the side so he was over the blonde; Sanzo's hand was freed, and he immediately began stroking it through Gojyo's tangled hair. Gojyo didn't seem to notice the monk pulling on knots, instead intent on smothering Sanzo with his lips and pelvic region.

Then Gojyo paused for breath. Sanzo was breathing hard, limp as he lay on the ground beneath the larger man, and Hakkai's mind conjured up a strikingly realistic visual of Sanzo lying naked and being ploughed into by Gojyo. He moaned aloud and bunched his hands at his sides. The pair didn't seem to notice; Gojyo was watching Sanzo, looking a little dazed as he did so, and Sanzo looked like he might have passed out.

Hakkai knew this was his chance; he steeled his resolve and put a hand on Gojyo's shoulder. "Gojyo, perhaps we should head back to our rooms now?"

"Oh yeah," Gojyo said, as if he knew all along where he was and what he was doing, and what they were SUPPOSED to be doing.

Hakkai shook his head. Gojyo stood, wobbled, and walked past Hakkai. Sanzo didn't stir for a moment, until his eye cracked open and spotted Hakkai. "Hmm," he moaned and looked like he would sit up.

"Do you feel sick, Sanzo?" Hakkai asked, astute as always. Sanzo nodded wordlessly and put a hand on his stomach as he was halfway to sitting upright. Hakkai patiently helped him up and led him back toward the inn. Gojyo was standing before the door, fumbling in his pockets. A cigarette dangled from his mouth. Hakkai approached with Sanzo following close behind and snatched the cancerstick from his mouth.

"Hey!" Gojyo said, making a completely off-target swipe to attempt at getting it back. The healer had already passed, and he almost hit Sanzo in the head. "Whoops, sorry," he said, following them inside. Sanzo didn't seem to hear him. He was watching his own feet walking behind Hakkai, eyes squinted.

Hakkai smiled at the receptionist who looked utterly bored and hurried to the stairs. He led the way up and stopped by Gojyo's room, which happened to be first. Sanzo walked in and looked around. "This isn't-" he managed before he quickly shut up and held his stomach again.

"This is Gojyo's room, Sanzo. Please wait here a moment."

Hakkai grabbed Gojyo by the biceps and guided him to the bed. He went without complaint, until Hakkai had him sit on it.

"Whoa wait... This is a bed," he said, a little stupidly.

_I should never have let them drink as much as they did this night_, Hakkai thought to himself, already feeling a pang of regret. _At least now I know that I was right... It _was_ something sexual._

"Yes Gojyo. It's bedtime now. Go to sleep. I'll be back in to check on you, alright?"

"Ehh... But..." Before he could say anything further Hakkai was guiding Sanzo out of the door.

They hurried to Sanzo's room and Hakkai helped Sanzo to the bed. He was oddly complacent about being touched right now; usually he shoved people away at any bodily contact. It didn't matter if Hakkai was trying to help him up or if he was injured...first chance he got, he'd push. Not tonight.

Just from that Hakkai should have known. But he was completely unprepared for what happened next. One moment he was standing before Sanzo, and the next the drunk man was half-standing, hands on the back of Hakkai's head and neck. Surprised, Hakkai bent forward and ended up meeting him halfway. Their lips touched before Hakkai could back away. Sanzo had a firm grip on him, though his aim had been slightly off; but more than half of their lips was touching, and Hakkai already felt his flagging member twitch.

The earlier scene came rushing back, and at the same time he felt Sanzo's pliant lips on his. The blonde backed off an inch and reaimed, hardly giving Hakkai time to finish his gasp of surprise before he smashed their lips back together, this time full on. Again Hakkai felt that light-headed sensation as all the blood in his head dropped into his nether regions.

For a few seconds his mind was blissfully blank, unable to react, too shocked and aroused to think. Then his judgment came rushing back and he jerked back, holding Sanzo's face by the jaw when he tried to kiss him again. He took a shuddering breath and said, "Sanzo, you are very drunk. Go to sleep now."

Sanzo's eyes fluttered, finally settling somewhat glassy-eyed on Hakkai's. Hakkai had turned the light on when they'd walked in, but Sanzo was cast in shadow. Even so, having those eyes look like _that_... Well, Hakkai didn't know what he felt. It seemed his cock knew better than he did, twitching within the tight confines of his jeans. He took another shuddering breath as he waited for Sanzo's reaction.

"You liked that, didn't you?" Sanzo accused, smirking. His eyes sharpened, his classic mean and calculating expression coming upon his face. Hakkai knew that face well. It was usually reserved for enemies who had done something stupid. The healer wasn't sure what he'd done to deserve that kind of a look, but he was afraid he'd find out soon enough.

"Let go of me, Sanzo," Hakkai cautioned, running scenarios through his mind. If he could get Sanzo to let go and lay down, sleep should come easily; alcohol always helped Sanzo sleep. It might not be for long, but it helped. If Sanzo fought for...whatever he was planning, someone could seriously get hurt. He was drunk, and wouldn't know his limits; Hakkai would hate to do something rash to get him to stop.

To the youkai's surprise, Sanzo did let go, though only one hand. He thought it was being put on the bed, but instead it grabbed his crotch area rather forcefully. Hakkai cried out and bucked his hips without meaning to. The pressure through the rough fabric of his jeans made him feel oversensitive; a hyper-awareness of who, exactly, was touching him there made it all that much worse. He felt like if that hand moved at all, he'd come right there. His own hands hovered in the air beside Sanzo, unsure of what to do.

"No, Sanzo," Hakkai groaned, but it was too late. The hand did move, gripping him intimately through the layers of clothes and stroked his length. He was already hard from before, from the kiss, but the touch made him harder. The pleasure shot up the healer's spine, immobilizing him. He was powerless to stop Sanzo from kissing him again, this time teasing him with a bit of tasted like...blood. At the taste Hakkai jerked back, but that just made Sanzo tighten his grip. The holy man's tongue stabbed forward, reclaiming its former territory and going deeper, making Hakkai shiver. He knew better, but he couldn't stop his tongue from responding. He opened his mouth wider, deepening the kiss, willing Sanzo to taste the bourbon still on his tongue. Besides the blood Hakkai could taste sake and cigarettes, and for some reason that made him feel even hotter.

The hand on his crotch lifted and he whimpered at the loss. Then he felt it fumbling with his pants and he gasped into Sanzo's insistent mouth. His hands gripped Sanzo's shoulders as the meaning behind Sanzo's actions had pleasure thrumming through his body. He moaned as the button on his jeans popped open and Sanzo shoved his hand roughly down into his pants. It was too much; with a sharp intake of breath and then a long-drawn out moan that was muffled by Sanzo's greedy lips, Hakkai came. His hips shot forward, pressing himself against Sanzo as his body betrayed him by collapsing, his hands fisting in Sanzo's robe. Sanzo ended the kiss and watched his face. Hakkai barely noticed this, still too wrapped up in postorgasmic bliss.

Breathing hard, Hakkai fumbled to gain his bearings and get away. He used his grip on Sanzo's shoulders as a surface to push off of to try to stand. While he managed it, Sanzo was not a very sturdy surface. The gentle push pressed him down on the bed, where he relaxed and let his hand slip from Hakkai's open fly. He held it up to reveal it dirtied by Hakkai's cum. It was dribbling down the pale flesh of his hand, and was quite obviously staining the black silk of his glove.

Mortified in more ways than he could count, Hakkai covered his face with a hand and closed his eyes. "I'm sorry," he lamented, his free hand trailing aimlessly at Sanzo, his dirty hand, and his still-open jeans. He was completely at a loss for what to do.

The monk chuckled. "Mmnh uhh hunh hunh hunh, that was fast."

Hakkai lowered his hand and opened his eyes. It had been awhile since he'd felt this shameful, and he knew it was showing on his face. He was speechless, instead quickly retreating from the bed and fixing his pants. Once covered again, and noting with disdain that he had some of his own stains from...certain actions...he turned back around.

Now he just wanted to go back to his room, perhaps take a quick and vigorous wash via the sink and a washcloth, and go to bed himself. But he couldn't leave his drunk friends like this. To think Sanzo was drunk enough to do this to him... he didn't even want to think about what was going to happen in the morning.

"Do—do you still... feel sick?" Hakkai asked, voice wavering.

Sanzo's eyes were closed and his hands were draped languidly with him on the bed. Beside his legs hanging over the side, he looked quite comfortable. "Nnn," he moaned.

It didn't sound like a sick type of moan. Just a 'leave me alone' type of moan. Sighing in exasperation, Hakkai again approached—with much trepidation this time—and helped Sanzo get on the bed correctly. He knew for a fact that Sanzo slept in the same clothing he wore during the day, thank god... He didn't want to have to undress him in any way right now.

Laying down had obviously changed his mood from horny to sleepy, because he didn't try anything else. His eyes were closed and he appeared asleep. Hakkai tucked in the blankets around him and caught himself staring at Sanzo's face. Sanzo was a beautiful man. He could still feel the press of his lips, the taste of them. The kiss had opened up the cut he'd received from the fight and blood was staining his lips. Hakkai's tongue automatically swept out over his own; he could still taste it. He took a shaky breath and pressed his thumb to Sanzo's lower lip. He let some chi stream out, tickling the cut. He then took a napkin from his pocket—Goku often needed cleaning up after and so he kept some on him—and wiped at the blood until Sanzo looked mostly better. There was still the angry bruise on his cheek, so he gently placed his hand on it and healed that too.

Done, he let out a haggard breath. In the morning he would have to check for more bruises or scrapes, but for now Sanzo looked as peaceful as could be. His breathing was deep and even. The healing hadn't woken him. Hakkai let himself enjoy the view for another moment before quietly walking to the door.

Hakkai smiled and shook his head and closed the door gently behind him. Now, as much as he wanted to go run and hide, he needed to check on Gojyo.

He gently rapped his knuckles on the door, but there was no response. Gojyo had, in the past, forgotten to take his shoes off before getting into bed when he was drunk, so Hakkai felt at liberty to go ahead and enter to check. The light was still on and Gojyo was on the bed, but he was not sleeping. His pants were only open enough to allow his erection free and he was stroking it and panting. Hakkai froze and felt the blush on his face return. "S—sorry," he muttered and went to leave. "Don't forget to take off your shoes," he added, quickly closing the door.

He couldn't believe this. What was going on? He had avoided thinking of his friend like this for years, and he'd just walked in on him for the first time... And he'd seen him making out with Sanzo before. After all that Sanzo had...molested him? That wasn't right, but Hakkai knew what had happened was all wrong. His head was so confused. Not wanting to think anymore about it and feeling more exhausted than he had in awhile, he quickly cleaned up and went to bed.

* * *

Chapter 5: Chapter 5

The first thing Hakkai noticed upon awakening was the chirping of birds outside his window. He opened his eyes and looked around the foreign hotel room. Sunlight streamed through the small window, illuminating the walls. He could tell it was early morning, perhaps about 8am. Sighing, he let himself relax a moment in a bleary haze. He had not had much sleep, and yet he was still waking up early! He'd been tossing and turning most of the night, waking up from dreams he only occassionally remembered. Some of them were the normal dreams of his past life mixing with his current one, leaving him as confused as they always did. The others, however, he knew had involved Sanzo and Gojyo. Those, he did not wish to remember, and didn't try. After a nice stretch he got out of bed. He took a moment to smooth the covers and tuck in the edges before gathering his things for the bath. After a moment of thought, he left them on the foot of his bed as he left the room.

A knot formed in his stomach the moment he stepped out and looked toward Sanzo's room, which was diagonal from his. He did not wish to see them; they were going to be very unpleasant to be around with hangovers, plus he wasn't sure how he felt about being near them after last night. But they had probably sustained some injury from the fighting and, seeing as it was his fault, he would have to heal them both. _Perhaps it is best to do so before they wake up_, he was assuming, heading for Sanzo's door first. He was the one he dreaded seeing most right now. The healer very strongly hoped that the monk would not remember a thing.

He unlocked it and turned the knob as quietly as he could, took a deep breath, then entered. Sanzo was asleep and looked as if he hadn't moved from where he'd been placed hours ago. Hakkai closed the door gently and approached slowly, making as little noise as possible. Seeing as how he was asleep, there was no need to wake him to assess his injuries yet. He would merely take away the likely headache and be gone.

He touched his fingers lightly to Sanzo's forehead and focused on his chi. He felt the familiar tingling sensation as the healing began, a small glow emanating from where he touched Sanzo. As he withdrew his hand, Sanzo's eyes opened. He quelled the desire to turn and run, instead giving Sanzo a smile and asking, "How are you feeling?"

Sanzo glared up at Hakkai, saying nothing.

Unfazed, Hakkai said, "Is there anything that hurts?"

Sanzo sat up, groaning as he did so. He seemed to think of something and began to raise his arm, then blanched before the cover even slipped off of it. "No," he said suddenly, and gruffly.

"Very good," Hakkai said. "Let me go attend to Gojyo. I will make some coffee and breakfast in about an hour. You can relax until then."

Sanzo grunted in reply and Hakkai could feel his eyes stabbing into his back as he left. He hoped he hadn't appeared as flustered as he felt. He realized only after he was shutting the door behind him that his heart was pounding wildly. He hadn't felt this way around Sanzo since... well, since he'd been Gonou. He'd left all his prior feelings behind years ago when he became Hakkai, trying instead to just feel grateful to Sanzo for speaking on his behalf and taking responsibility for him. But, he didn't want to think about that now.

He closed his eyes and let his heart calm down before moving to Gojyo's room. As he reached for the knob, the door to the room he just left opened. Out came Sanzo, head down, holding a bag that Hakkai recognized as his clothing luggage. "Sanzo?" he asked, but Sanzo didn't even look at him. Hakkai watched as Sanzo walked very fast down the hall before disappearing around the corner. Frowning, he decided to leave Sanzo alone (mostly from his own discomfort) and chose instead to unlock and enter Gojyo's room. Gojyo was fast asleep, his sheets tangled around his body. To Hakkai's dismay he saw clothes scattered over the floor that had not been there last night. Gojyo's bare legs and shoulders were sticking out from beneath the covers. A startlingly detailed memory of his cock in his hand and his pleasured expression came to mind unbidden. Hakkai almost ran away right then.

Hakkai looked at the wall above Gojyo's bed as he cautiously approached. Gojyo was not as light of a sleeper as Sanzo, but he was also surprisingly easy to wake up. He felt butterflies in his stomach when he forced his eyes down to look at Gojyo's sleeping face. Without his typical raunchy grin, he was a very beautiful man. Hakkai had always liked to admire his sleeping face. Swallowing hard, Hakkai put his fingertips to his forehead and concentrated on healing. After the glow dissipated he waited nervously for him to wake up, but he kept on sleeping peacefully. With a soundless sigh of relief, Hakkai began to take a few steps back when he treaded on a discarded article of clothing. Tsking quietly, he set to picking up the dirty clothing and putting them into a much neater pile. An inhaled breath and stirring on the bed cued Hakkai into the fact that Gojyo was waking up. He tried not to cringe when Gojyo said, "Kai?"

"Go back to sleep, Gojyo. You don't have to wake up yet," he replied in an almost-whisper while he finished putting the clothing in order. He glanced at Gojyo, but Gojyo was stretching. He quickly looked away when the blanket looked ready to slip off.

It seemed that Gojyo was not going back to sleep, which was unusual. He quickly headed for the door before things got more awkward.

"Kai, why're you runnin'?"

Hakkai felt the urge to hush him—after all, he was NOT running, merely rushing—and exit immediately, but he felt obliged to answer. "I'm merely off to take a bath, Gojyo. You can go back to sleep. Breakfast won't be ready for an hour yet."

"Thas ok, I'm feelin' pretty good." He sounded accusatory, and Hakkai merely smiled, not meeting his eyes. After a moment, he followed with, "Can I join ya?"

Hakkai felt a furious fluttering in his stomach and had to swallow hard. For some moments no words could come out.

"Hakkai?"

"Ahem, yes," Hakkai said, clearing his throat too loudly and barely squeaking out the 'yes'. He felt his ears burning. _Gojyo must be able to look right through me. I feel like an idiot._

"...uh, cool. Lemme get some clothes on."

If ever there was a good time to leave, it was now. Hakkai left without saying a word. He walked swiftly to his own room and shut the door. Safe once again, he stood in front of the door and tried desperately to figure out what he was going to do. It was nearly impossible.

It had been so hard to let go of how he felt about Gojyo when he became Hakkai. Even now, he had to admit to himself that he hadn't been entirely successful. If Gojyo gave him an intimate look or if they were alone together, he could feel his body react in an entirely inappropriate way—but it had faded over the years... or perhaps he had became so used to it he no longer felt uncomfortable about it. However, now that he'd seen Gojyo engage in sexual acts—kissing Sanzo, touching himself—he was feeling it at full force again. Even though it had been a brief look, and had nothing to do with himself. Perhaps it was mainly due to the fact that Gojyo had been aroused by a _man_, who was also _Sanzo_.

Deep within his chest he felt the familiar pain of loss, and it was all he could do not to crumble to the ground where he stood. He was a murderer, someone who had sinned so grievously that the gods had seen fit to take away the only thing that he'd ever loved, the only thing he'd lived for: Kanan. Not that he believed in gods or a god, but it had been awfully fitting. He had yearned to die. And then, Gojyo had saved him—not just from his wounds, but he'd given him a reason to live again. Thanks to Gojyo, he had realized that he had to pay for his crimes; dying was the easy way out. He owed him so much. He hadn't known him for long when he discovered that he'd slowly but surely been drawn in by Gojyo's kind nature, his jokes, and his smile. Then, in one night, he discovered that Gojyo was capable of liking men...and was involved with Sanzo—not him, even though they had been close for years. He had no right to feel jealous, but he felt it all the same.

"Yo, Hakkai!" Gojyo said through the door, knocking. "You in there?"

Hakkai took a step and a half away from the door, startled. "Um, yes."

"C'mon, let's go before the monkey wakes up. I ain't gonna listen to him begging for food while we try to wash up." As Hakkai listened to him through the door, he went to his bed and picked up his washing things. Taking a deep breath and trying to clear his mind, he walked to the door. How he would survive this bath—normally so casual—without embarrassing himself, he wasn't sure.


End file.
